James Perch

my right foot is like a wet dream...

[James Perch @JamesPerch]

@alan_mac you love a bit of perch!!!

[James Perch @JamesPerch]

I am (not) perch hear me roooooooooooar!!!

[James Perch @JamesPerch]

Cheik has been giving me tackling lessons & I'm getting better, can't wait to snap that greasy Scott Parker in two and feed him to my lion!

[James Perch @JamesPerch]

I am fucking mint told all y'all mother fuckers! #nufc

[James Perch @JamesPerch]

Perch nearly creamed when yohan came running over to bench after his goal

[James Perch @JamesPerch]

Shola got a goal that's me having another go on his bike get in poppa shola!

[James Perch @JamesPerch]

If perch get 5 more followers to go over 100 shola gonna take me to park n buy me candy floss #nufc

[James Perch @JamesPerch]

Morning Perchites breakfast time again today's cereal is golden Grahams using my special bowl, it has a race car o. It neeeeow

[James Perch @JamesPerch]

Thanks to all followers I christen u all
Perchites I'm off to do clean shola's boots with Bruce's tears it's how shola get his powers #nufc

[James Perch @JamesPerch]

@adkpt83 good old Doris!

[James Perch @JamesPerch]

@adkpt83 thought it looked familiar! I hope she offered u a reach around when she threw on the strap on??

[ak @adkpt83]

@JamesPerch it's even worse u pretending u r a shit footballer mate! it's pretty funny how pathetic you are you tool @mattylevi @Den_Lindig

[James Perch @JamesPerch]

@adkpt83 aye but ur shirt is shit!

[James Perch @JamesPerch]

@NUFCThreatLevel only when shola let's me tho

[James Perch @JamesPerch]

@NUFCThreatLevel Friday fact straight from The Perch's mouth...Colin is a stupid smelly head and I shagged his mam! Colin 0 The Perch 1

[James Perch @JamesPerch]

Another thing perch loves getting bites off #smb who clearly think this is really the perch, hate to shatter those illusions I'm like Santa

[James Perch @JamesPerch]

“@GeordieJohn: @JamesPerch #PerchShipwreck” best suggestion! Perch likes this as much as I do riding on shola's bike! #nufc

[James Perch @JamesPerch]

Going to start new # like @TaylorandBesty #cabayedreamboat not #PerchDreamBoat but #PerchTugBoat me no pretty but me functional #nufc

[James Perch @JamesPerch]

“@adkpt83: @JamesPerch @mattylevi @den_lindig Geordie berk” perch finds u amusing but is bored if u now #SMB #PerchDreamBoat #nufc

[James Perch @JamesPerch]

“@adkpt83: @JamesPerch how sads this cunt here like! Pretending to be a footballer! Grow up ya berk @mattylevi @Den_Lindig” vintage mackem