Jamie Langer

[For Sale: Gender Reveal Tire, Lightly Used @SparrowAdorer]

"So what's your take"
"This subway should be filled with sarin, a deadly nerve agent"
"100% disagree"

[josh (oldfriend99) @oldfriend99]

This is straight up false. it was in 1939

[John Kennedy @FrazzleMyGimp]

“wait a second… Heat rises” (it hits me) “heat rises!”

Bank teller on floor: what?

“Heat rises!”

(I rush at the armed robber and he shoots me in the face killing me instantly. It’s unclear what my plan was)

[jennnnnaaaaa @uh_its_jen]

Lady came running into the hospital covered head to toe in mud saying she hit this dog and it went running into the swamp so she had to catch it. Took me a minute before I said “guys I don’t think this is a dog.” So anyway, placed my first IV in a coyote🥴😭

[Prospect Park Zoo @prospectparkzoo]

If you have a cat at home, this scene is probably familiar! Just like domestic cats, scratching is a natural behavior for sand cats. In their natural desert habitat, sand cats use their claws to dig in the sand, climb, and catch prey. (1/2)

[Haus of Decline @hausofdecline]

This Blue Jays season feels like a Metroid. a story contrivance caused us to lose all our powerups at the beginning and we must now traverse a labyrinthine hell in order to get back our Springers and Kirks so we can defeat the infernal Space Lizards that are the Dodgers

[CityNews Toronto @CityNewsTO]

#LATEST: Davis Schneider's brother died of an overdose. The Toronto Blue Jays outfielder says naloxone can save others. https://t.co/ovBaoKm1NK

[Sridhar Ramesh @RadishHarmers]

I just met God. She's black. And Her message for humanity is [I begin speaking in a horribly caricatured blaccent]

[cowboy postbop @cowboy_postbop]

there's actually a very sweet NYT piece about young closeted gay boys bonding with Hooters waitresses during the experience (gift link below):

https://t.co/Llsc63iocO

[Jamie Langer @JamieLanger]

@HelloHalima @Imman_Adan And he acted like it was ridiculous that they would be a top 6 team. I don’t care if he thinks they’re a bogus 5th seed or not, they shouldn’t have been anywhere close with that attitude

[Jamie Langer @JamieLanger]

@BadPostsLLC Yeah, I guess after he died people weren't inundated with footage of him being odd like we were back in the early 2000's, and the estate could reshape his image. It has been interesting seeing younger people discover the Bashir interview, etc.

[Jamie Langer @JamieLanger]

@celinedionysus_ I feel like every Neil Young album is like this

[Animation Obsessive @ani_obsessive]

From: Citizen Harold (1971), dir. Hugh Foulds, National Film Board of Canada

[Jamie Langer @JamieLanger]

@payphoneexhibit It’s not really a remake, but Pelin Esmer made a documentary about her uncle called The Collector and then made a narrative feature, 10 to 11, that stars him and is based on him

[ShinyMcShine: Simpsons Quotes @ShinyMcShine_]

"Kids, let me tell you about another so-called "wicked" guy. He had long hair and some wild ideas, and he didn't always do what other people thought was right.
And that man's name was--I forget. But the point is--I forget that too. Marge, you know who I'm talking about. He used to drive that blue car."

[Ryan Grim @ryangrim]

An extremist group in Washington, DC has claimed credit for the terrorist attack on the Iranian bridge, promising further attacks on civilian infrastructure if its demands aren't met