janna mae 🍋

mom brain, 6w5.

[fran @galacticidiots]

No, using an em dash a lot isn’t a sign of AI because the em dash is not punctuation, it’s a vibe. It’s a feeling. You don’t use it because it makes grammatical sense — you use it because your heart tells you to. AI couldn’t possibly do it well because it lacks one.

[janna mae 🍋 @JannaMaeee]

Me, spending some time at the end of the night finally relaxing (disassociating)

[janna mae 🍋 @JannaMaeee]

My toxic trait is that the weather rises above 70 degrees and my whole body and soul goes into vacation mode. Responsibilities? Sorry the only task on my to-do list is “sip lemonade and experience sunshine.”

[janna mae 🍋 @JannaMaeee]

Every Twenty-One Pilots song sounds like the lyrics were written by Tom from 500 Days of Summer

[janna mae 🍋 @JannaMaeee]

Me: *opens Hulu*

Hulu: FILMMAKER MODE is TURNED OFFFFFF so don’t even TRY IT

Me: (no idea what filmmaker mode means) ok

[janna mae 🍋 @JannaMaeee]

Okay I did speak too soon about Brittany and Ken…that man on his phone emotionless while she was crying trying to explain her feelings? And then he just said ok sounds like we aren’t meant to be? My dude. You fell from grace hard. I had faith.

[janna mae 🍋 @JannaMaeee]

Sorry I love the created drama between Brittany and Ken that they’re working hard on…they can sit in SILENCE…is it weird?? He’s on his PHONE SOMETIMES…will they make it??

[janna mae 🍋 @JannaMaeee]

Facebook is always like “You have 12 notifications! You’re so popular! See what your friends have to say over there!!” And then it’s just 11 notifications saying people I don’t remember friending posted stories and one like from my grandmother on a photo I posted two weeks ago.

[janna mae 🍋 @JannaMaeee]

Netflix also asked me today if I’d like to “watch in ultra HD for an additional $7.50 per month” and I’m ?? You think I’m here for image clarity? I need to see the pores of the Stranger Things cast?? You could dim every scene and I’d let it happen before paying an extra $7.50

[janna mae 🍋 @JannaMaeee]

Netflix is just pumping out the Love is Blind seasons and I am HERE FOR IT

[janna mae 🍋 @JannaMaeee]

Here's a mom hack: find a snack that no one else in your house likes because that's the only way you're getting to get to enjoy it all yourself

[janna mae 🍋 @JannaMaeee]

Super Bowl Sunday. Chiefs vs. someone. The lights go down for the halftime show. But suddenly. The screens flash black and white. “Don’t Blame Me” starts playing over the speakers. Taylor’s mysteriously missing from the suite. It’s rep tv time baby.

[janna mae 🍋 @JannaMaeee]

It’s the “Hey, Mom” for me for some reason

[Ari Meirov @MySportsUpdate]

Mama Kelce looking for Jason after last year's Super Bowl always hits me right in the feels.

"Go celebrate with Trav" gets me every time.

[janna mae 🍋 @JannaMaeee]

Eagles defense doing these little dances after making 3/10000 stops in this game. Get serious.

[janna mae 🍋 @JannaMaeee]

1. Why even have defense on the field at this point?
2. 3rd & 2? Yeah throwing it makes sense!!! Especially when we have a nearly unstoppable play for 4th & 1!!
3. 🥲

[janna mae 🍋 @JannaMaeee]

@Ayo_Bdon Because every clothing store you go into your first thought is, “that’s not a shirt” but is is a shirt.

[janna mae 🍋 @JannaMaeee]

Nothing will make you feel more over age 30 than walking around your local mall

[janna mae 🍋 @JannaMaeee]

“Director of Cocaine Bear, Elizabeth Banks” how dare you

[janna mae 🍋 @JannaMaeee]

@Ayo_Bdon Didn’t wanna be the one to tell you

[janna mae 🍋 @JannaMaeee]

Remember in middle school when one of the most popular songs was a guy just being like “women are so beautiful - they make me want to KILL MYSELF” and we were all just like what a jam for real