JennyDidn'tDoIt

My kids have destroyed everything. Oh, wait, that's still... nevermind. My favourite braincell has glitter on it now, too.

[JennyDidn'tDoIt @JenaluWeber]

@kate_kt411 @annaspargoryan There's swelling involved?

[JennyDidn'tDoIt @JenaluWeber]

Hey, @WestJet , you should probably make sure your flight attendants don't hate children. I mean, who gets pissy with a two year old for being restless in a very confined space? They're a little bit inexperienced at life, eh?

[JennyDidn'tDoIt @JenaluWeber]

*searches ‘donair shop near me’*
Google: “what the heck is a ‘donair’? Here, let me fling DQ, A&W, and random pizza places at you.”
*cries into maple syrup*
ALL I WANT IS ONE DONAIR! (Okay, maybe more than one.)
#GoHomeGoogle #JustFindMeADonair #PleaseAndThanks

[JennyDidn'tDoIt @JenaluWeber]

I really don’t know where people got the idea that rabbits are gentle and sweet. I’ve never witnessed anything but purely naughty mayhem.

[JennyDidn'tDoIt @JenaluWeber]

Those of you without crippling social awkwardness: what is it like? How does it feel to not mentally alternate between bludgeoning yourself and curling into the fetal position? I'm asking because I literally cannot imagine what it's like. #SociallyAwkward #ISOHumanSizeTurtleShell

[JennyDidn'tDoIt @JenaluWeber]

@Boutyme1 @MenInKiltsSTARZ @SamHeughan They think Canada's on the moon. It's the only logical explanation for those aneurysm-inducing shipping fees and the hilarious/infuriating lack of mutual streaming services.

[JennyDidn'tDoIt @JenaluWeber]

@tanyaphillips18 @TheBloggess Those small bugs aren't exactly fun, but at least they're not glaringly obvious. It's entirely possible to ignore no-see-ems until they decide to drink out of your tear ducts.

[JennyDidn'tDoIt @JenaluWeber]

@TheBloggess Reading. Maybe. Also, maybe not. How do I tell if it's working?

[JennyDidn'tDoIt @JenaluWeber]

@TheBloggess Strangely enough, a choose-your-story app introduced me to two new amazing authours, one of which has a paranormal series that I'm looking at like a box of fancy chocolate that *should* be savoured. I know I'll be plowing through it in days once I start, though.

[JennyDidn'tDoIt @JenaluWeber]

@SlenderSherbet You truly have not slept until you've tried a feather bed.

[JennyDidn'tDoIt @JenaluWeber]

@annaspargoryan That would be a nope. I’ve a sister who lives there and I avoid looking at maps. I ask google to tell me which road leads me through that hellish travel spaghetti and hope for the best.

[JennyDidn'tDoIt @JenaluWeber]

It sounds harsh, but I have no mercy left in my soul for the type of person who smokes in public places. (Long walk, short dock type of thing.)

[JennyDidn'tDoIt @JenaluWeber]

@ABOotlanders Is this a trap?

[JennyDidn'tDoIt @JenaluWeber]

It gets funnier every time you watch it! 🤣

[JennyDidn'tDoIt @JenaluWeber]

Crying tears of stress relief over here.

[JennyDidn'tDoIt @JenaluWeber]

@1evanwilliams @oakleyfire1 @ConanOBrien So backwards. We’re the reason their White House had to be painted white after 1812.

[JennyDidn'tDoIt @JenaluWeber]

@MykeCole Having my carpool partner be late to work, even though *I* wasn’t late, because my fiancé drove me. (I was so shocked that I couldn’t even speak, which is completely NOT me.)

[JennyDidn'tDoIt @JenaluWeber]

@draiochta14 It's like having people yell: "all bones matter!" whilst whacking your broken arm. Does no one understand the concept of triage?

[JennyDidn'tDoIt @JenaluWeber]

@ABOotlanders @CesarDomboy @LlaurenLyle I rarely cry over books, but this page has a rather wrinkled appearance in my copy. The whole scene is a laugh-cry fest.

[JennyDidn'tDoIt @JenaluWeber]

@JanRobinson0329 @Herne @MykeCole Gloves are quite excellent at being removable, one might even suspect that it's their purpose.