Jeremy Massler

Where there's war, I bring peace. Where there's crime, I bring punishment. Where there's sense, I bring sensibility.

[Jeremy Massler @JeremyMassler]

Football is better than soccer.

[Jeremy Massler @JeremyMassler]

Ah, fuck. Not again.

[Radley Balko @radleybalko]

Breaking: Germany, Japan call off remainder of game, announce they’ve allied, plan to take on the rest of the field.

[Jeremy Massler @JeremyMassler]

@ByYourLogic Are you a time traveler in this scenario? Because if so, you should probably kill “Big H” as a baby and *then* run for political office. Best of both worlds.

[Jeremy Massler @JeremyMassler]

Wordle 233 6/6*

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[Jeremy Massler @JeremyMassler]

@Hero_Complex My guess before seeing other people’s replies was Stan Lee. Reasoning: I know you would’ve met Christopher Reeve. Antonin Scalia is too random to be a curveball. And of the other three names, the only one I recognize is Stan Lee.

[Jeremy Massler @JeremyMassler]

Wordle 205 3/6

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[Jeremy Massler @JeremyMassler]

Hot take: The best way to check NFL scores is https://t.co/0wkFE1vGOS. No pop-ups, no ads, no autoplay videos. It’s compact. Plus you get crucial updates about any Scorigamis.

[Jeremy Massler @JeremyMassler]

Everyone be quiet. I need to focus.

[Jeremy Massler @JeremyMassler]

I don’t get why Skateboarding is an Olympic sport but Cornhole isn’t.

[Jeremy Massler @JeremyMassler]

I like how Matthew Keys will just argue with people on Reddit who are talking about his court case:
https://t.co/rLmECWyLmw

[Jeremy Massler @JeremyMassler]

Still trying to get a read on this Robinhood app and stock prices in general. I bought $5 of Peloton stock last week, and on Saturday safety regulators released a “terrifying” video of a child getting sucked under a Peloton treadmill. Will that make their stock price go down?

[Jeremy Massler @JeremyMassler]

I'm futzing around with the Robinhood App. I've never invested before, so I went with the Genesis 1:1 investment strategy: World Fuel Services (INT), Hawaiian Electric (HE), Bloom Energy (BE), Goldman Sachs Innovate Equity ETF (GINN) and ING Group (ING). It's working well so far.

[Jeremy Massler @JeremyMassler]

@Hero_Complex @JohnnyMcNulty I associate your house with Goldeneye. Funny how we all think of different games.

[Jeremy Massler @JeremyMassler]

In the future, everyone will be Pizzagated for 15 minutes.

[Right Wing Watch @RightWingWatch]

Because @TuckerCarlson dared to criticize Sidney Powell, radical right-wing conspiracy theorist Rick Wiles is now pizzagating him.

[Jeremy Massler @JeremyMassler]

@J38869658 @CosmicIndiffer1 @RightWingWatch @TuckerCarlson Not your type??? He's Aquaman!

[Jeremy Massler @JeremyMassler]

I figured out who's behind @CJTruth, the popular QAnon-supporting Twitter account. He's a bodybuilder, and he might even run against Dan Crenshaw in 2022: https://t.co/QQwxXPHZtn

[Jeremy Massler @JeremyMassler]

Don't look now, but the Giants have won 2 in a row. #PlayoffsBound

[Jeremy Massler @JeremyMassler]

The #Maidengate girl goes NUCLEAR on Mike Cernovich and Jack Posobiec after not getting their support: "F**k them. F**k them so f**king hard. It is the most bulls**t thing I've ever heard in my life...I will f**king set their whole career on f**king fire." https://t.co/QFWO4Xc9nR

[Jeremy Massler @JeremyMassler]

A sticked post on TheDonald[.]win is pushing the "MaidenGate" voter fraud theory. Lauren (aka @SomeBitchIKnow) is teaming up with @Ali, and she's hinting that the women's activist group Supermajority could be behind it all...whatever "it all" is.

[Jeremy Massler @JeremyMassler]

It’s a mad world.

[Mike @FuctupMike]

Twitter just suspended @mad_liberals

GD! This is absurd!