Asclepias Straussaea

Animation Faculty at MassArt. Dad to boys, dogs, many bikes, rapidly expanding garden. RISD alum. #LGM #COYS.

[Asclepias Straussaea @JesseSchmal]

@SNY_Mets Funny, I was flirting with the idea of an IG that was nothing but overdubbing Mendoza press conferences in that voice.

[Asclepias Straussaea @JesseSchmal]

@SNY_Mets What a fuggin bummer; so many games left to endure this hot pile.

[Asclepias Straussaea @JesseSchmal]

@SNY_Mets Be better like, be Nolan Arenado and not Brett Baty.

Be Ozzie Albies and not Marcus Semien

Be Sal Stewart and not…jeezus we don’t even have a fuggin 1st baseman.

[Asclepias Straussaea @JesseSchmal]

@SNY_Mets

[Asclepias Straussaea @JesseSchmal]

@PitchingNinja If the Mets clean house now, maybe they can have a watchable offense by the time McLean hits his prime.

[Asclepias Straussaea @JesseSchmal]

@SNY_Mets We’ve all seen some really bad Mets teams. But THIS really bad Mets team, this is some superlative bad.

[Asclepias Straussaea @JesseSchmal]

@Mets We’re getting relegated.

[Asclepias Straussaea @JesseSchmal]

It seems like a no-brainer to me: the @Mets next #cityconnects should be inspired by the Shea Stadium neon. The color of concrete is not so fun as it turns out.

[Asclepias Straussaea @JesseSchmal]

@ditzkoff Unless they got funny-shaped ones.

[Asclepias Straussaea @JesseSchmal]

@FabrizioRomano @BeanymanSports

[Asclepias Straussaea @JesseSchmal]

@JackPittBrooke Journalists need to press this ownership: what is the plan? This year? Next year? Next three? The club is a middling formless complaint right now.

[Asclepias Straussaea @JesseSchmal]

@SNY_Mets The only things that make sense here are that

1. Diaz wants to win a ring and the Mets org doesn’t inspire confidence.

2. He took the Williams signing as an insult or show of disrespect.

I don’t believe Hefner and palm trees move the needle.

[Asclepias Straussaea @JesseSchmal]

@cartilagefree I’m the Rap-pin’ Granny
and I’m here to say…

[Asclepias Straussaea @JesseSchmal]

@SNY_Mets @SugarDiaz39 Take your time, bud; you’re not missing ANYTHING.

[Asclepias Straussaea @JesseSchmal]

@growingwisdom I’ve been pulling creeping bellflower like it’s my job 😔

[Asclepias Straussaea @JesseSchmal]

@thfcboston Holy moly, I live in Medford. No excuse now!
COYS!!! Come on Big Ange!

[Asclepias Straussaea @JesseSchmal]

I lamented the humor drop off in Lasso s03, but it turns out my 8-yo thinks it’s the funniest thing in…ever. Touché, Lasso.

[Asclepias Straussaea @JesseSchmal]

@sarahclazarus Shoot where did I leave my keys…
Maybe they’re in the othER ROOOOOOM!

[Asclepias Straussaea @JesseSchmal]

This has got to be the best single-worded take in cinema.
Andy! https://t.co/JrHgCCfkEV via @YouTube

[Asclepias Straussaea @JesseSchmal]

@growingwisdom My solidago this season looks like it’s ready to march and take over my whole yard.