Jessica

[Boring Tweeter @b0ringtweets]

To hell* with it. I'm staying up until 10.15pm because it's Christmas and #YOLO

*pardon my French

[Wolf Pack Alan @WolfpackAlan]

Hoes be like "hoes be like" but they be the hoes that be like.

[Wolf Pack Alan @WolfpackAlan]

All I want for Christmas is you.

LOL JK I want an iPhone 5S

[Ricky Gervais @rickygervais]

Hey, there's no point in just sitting round feeling sorry for yourself. Because no one gives a fuck. Have a great day :)

[out of context things @TheComedyHumor]

It’s science you guys #NoShaveNovember

[out of context things @TheComedyHumor]

While in the shower:
2% Washing.
8% Singing.
90% Winning fake arguments.

[Ricky Gervais @rickygervais]

Remember, don't sit around feeling sorry for yourself. Because no one gives a fuck.

[Boring Tweeter @b0ringtweets]

It's not as windy as what they said it would be.

[out of context things @TheComedyHumor]

*When my name was in a math problem*
Class: *Stares at me*
Me: That's right bitches, I bought 60 watermelons.

[Jessica @Jessica_Rose_B]

The friendzone: not just for blokes.

[Joel Dommett @joeldommett]

I didn't put my clocks forward the last time. WINNER

[Jessica @Jessica_Rose_B]

This day is made for being crazy and irresponsible. I plan to be spontaneous

[Jessica @Jessica_Rose_B]

Mmm warburtons seeded batch.

[Boring Tweeter @b0ringtweets]

It's warm milk o'clock.

[out of context things @TheComedyHumor]

*Sends risky text*
15 seconds later, no reply.
"Oh God what have I done!"

[Jessica @Jessica_Rose_B]

I just ate an apple (red)

[Jessica @Jessica_Rose_B]

@evertonian82 mmmmmmmm boobies @Gem_TheRealOne haha