Jess 🥴

[Chris Thorburn @CBThorburn]

Fuck your ChatGPT, if I want to see a caricature of myself I will make the effort to go to the seaside and pay £15 for a cruel man to give me body dysmorphia like we’ve always done.

[Jess 🥴 @Jessicanewton]

Stopped screaming into the abyss on here and took it to LinkedIn instead eff em ell

[Jess 🥴 @Jessicanewton]

Sometimes you’ve gotta sack off a Monday spin class for pizza and a glass of wine

[carol*ne @yelyussy]

sorry

[Jess 🥴 @Jessicanewton]

My July round up? Not much just got invited to another 2 baby showers

[Jess 🥴 @Jessicanewton]

I know I need to break patterns of avoidance / sticking to a familiar hell but Christ alive dating apps are the PITS and make me want to stay alone forever

[Jess 🥴 @Jessicanewton]

God I WISH I was seeing Noah kahan

[Jess 🥴 @Jessicanewton]

Never thought I’d be thinking about insoles as much as I do at 32

[trash jones @jzux]

feeling kind of lonely today. maybe i should open instagram and see 8 different people i know from college getting married

[Jess 🥴 @Jessicanewton]

I always feel sad on Fridays! Not very Fri yay of me

[Jess 🥴 @Jessicanewton]

Since being in my fitness girl era my body seems to have decided that if I dare have a day off exercising, I will not get to sleep easily. Is my mid physique not punishment enough?!

[Jess 🥴 @Jessicanewton]

Obvs knew it was gonna happen but the last of us was still a brutal watch ayyyyiiiiyiiii

[leyla 🍒 @mrswamsbsgans]

put them in that damn hotel

[Jess 🥴 @Jessicanewton]

Avoiding white lotus spoilers today like my life depends on it

[Jess 🥴 @Jessicanewton]

How does one find a man like Bob Mortimer

[Jess 🥴 @Jessicanewton]

God I am so excited to see the basement yard boys

[Jess 🥴 @Jessicanewton]

Ermmmm should I move to Sheffield again??

[Jess 🥴 @Jessicanewton]

Why do I feel so embarrassed using an umbrella in London

[Jess 🥴 @Jessicanewton]

Tickets secured 🫡

[Jess 🥴 @Jessicanewton]

NOW who is going to come see the basement yard boys with me in either London or Dublin or do I go alone and hope I meet the love of my life there