Jim Carrey Comedy

Here's Epic Jim Carrey to amaze you again. Parody Fan Page.

[Jim Carrey Comedy @JimCarreyComedy]

If the pen is mightier than the sword, and a picture is worth a thousand words, then just how dangerous is a fax?

[Jim Carrey Comedy @JimCarreyComedy]

Twitter is like a fridge. When you're bored you keep opening & closing it every few minutes to see if there's anything good in it...

[Jim Carrey Comedy @JimCarreyComedy]

Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self esteem, first make sure you are not, in fact, just surrounded by assholes.

[Jim Carrey Comedy @JimCarreyComedy]

When we drink we get drunk.
When we get drunk we fall asleep.
When we fall asleep we commit no sin.
When we commit no sin we go to heaven.

[Jim Carrey Comedy @JimCarreyComedy]

You’'re a boob.
Just tittin.
You're my breast friend.

[Jim Carrey Comedy @JimCarreyComedy]

$900 for an iPhone 6 ?
Airplane mode better take me on vacation !

[Jim Carrey Comedy @JimCarreyComedy]

*Missed a call*
*Calls back*
*No answer*
What, did you die within 3 seconds?

[Jim Carrey Comedy @JimCarreyComedy]

Mom: "Why is everything on the floor?!"
Me: "Gravity, mom"

[Jim Carrey Comedy @JimCarreyComedy]

What is the fastest way to determine the sex of a chromosome?
Pull down its genes.

[Jim Carrey Comedy @JimCarreyComedy]

Plot Twist: There is no Plot Twist.

[Jim Carrey Comedy @JimCarreyComedy]

Reasons why I don't let my gf play my PS 4:

1. I don't have PS 4
2. I don't have gf

[Jim Carrey Comedy @JimCarreyComedy]

IMDb should introduce ratings in negative numbers so that people know how bad some movies are.

[Jim Carrey Comedy @JimCarreyComedy]

Who else hates the sound of their own voice on video?

[Jim Carrey Comedy @JimCarreyComedy]

I wish college had coupons. Buy one semester, get one semester free!

[Jim Carrey Comedy @JimCarreyComedy]

School Better Go As Fast As Summer Did ! 😒

[Jim Carrey Comedy @JimCarreyComedy]

70% of our planet is covered by water, the other 30% is covered by idiots.

[Jim Carrey Comedy @JimCarreyComedy]

You’'re a b00b.
Just tittin.
You're my breast friend.

[Jim Carrey Comedy @JimCarreyComedy]

how to win an argument:

have a vagina
that's it
congrats

[Jim Carrey Comedy @JimCarreyComedy]

when a girl says "lol have fun"
do not have fun
abort mission
i repeat
ABORT MISSION

[Jim Carrey Comedy @JimCarreyComedy]

okay = Everything's cool.
okay? = You make no sense.
okay…= You're creepy.
okayy = I don't care.
Okay. = I'm pissed off.