Jimmy

Toby Flenderson is everything that is wrong with the paper industry.

[Jimmy @JimForShort]

@germansean This is like people who sue McDonald’s because they’re fat

[Jimmy @JimForShort]

@franciscellis I felt this

[Jimmy @JimForShort]

@germansean @KendallJenner She throwing whaaaa???

[Jimmy @JimForShort]

@SamHuntMusic, what would I take for you to record a cameo-style video for one of your biggest supporters? We already have tickets to your show this summer !

[Jimmy @JimForShort]

@RealjoeBOSS @BozziSean @clockwerks @KatzM @lukezim @sarloc73 @Carlsahn @jordanpereira23 @ImBrettKaz Jeter, Junior, Pudge, Randy Johnson

[Jimmy @JimForShort]

@FatKidDeals do you still have any promo codes for that pregnancy pillow?

[Jimmy @JimForShort]

@jordanpereira23 @RealjoeBOSS @BozziSean

[Jimmy @JimForShort]

@AlldawayTurner Sir, this is a Wendy’s

[Jimmy @JimForShort]

@stassi where are you we wannatqke a picture with you

[Jimmy @JimForShort]

@amandaafasanz 90% of the athletes you like cheat on their wives

[Project Big Screen @ProjBigScreen]

"Old Town Road" @LilNasX x @billyraycyrus remix set to the dance scene from 'Napoleon Dynamite'

[Jimmy @JimForShort]

@stoolpresidente Who would’ve thought that gambling with a guy named “mush” wouldn’t end well?

[Jimmy @JimForShort]

@sonicdrivein @amandaafasanz @ImBrettKaz @barstoolsports @ChipotleTweets @ChickfilA Sonic is dollar store DQ Grill & Chill

[Jimmy @JimForShort]

@amandaafasanz @ImBrettKaz @barstoolsports @ChipotleTweets

[Jimmy @JimForShort]

Do you two need a minute?

[Khloé @khloekardashian]

Why are you lying @jordynwoods ?? If you’re going to try and save yourself by going public, INSTEAD OF CALLING ME PRIVATELY TO APOLOGIZE FIRST, at least be HONEST about your story. BTW, You ARE the reason my family broke up!

[Jimmy @JimForShort]

@stoolpresidente Whoever’s in charge of your audio levels for this and the rundown should be sent to Guantanamo

[Jimmy @JimForShort]

Bob Kraft is a creepy old man. In other news, sky is blue, water is wet.

[The Associated Press @AP]

BREAKING: Police in Florida have charged New England Patriots owner Robert Kraft with misdemeanor solicitation of prostitution.

[Jimmy @JimForShort]

@Vin_Chenzi That is going to be epic.

Sidebar: do cats age normally or is there a dog-year situation I’m not aware of?

[Jimmy @JimForShort]

Guys, the shitty rappers are spawning we’re too late

[Complex @Complex]

Lil Xan is about to be a dad. https://t.co/OOGF6PbQ8a