Joe D

carbon based

[Joe D @JoeDe_Luca]

@KubrickPoint Today HAL would read their lips and Instagram would coincidentally suggest a manual podbay door opener and a space helmet.

[Joe D @JoeDe_Luca]

@sulldavid Ha!
Gabe Kaplan had wheels!

[Joe D @JoeDe_Luca]

The system going forward is that the losers of the NFL all-star game will be the USA Soccer Team.
#USABEL

[Joe D @JoeDe_Luca]

As we rebuild the US Soccer system, we should harness what’s great about American athletes, like Joey Chestnut and Hock Tuah Girl.

[Alex @ajak1033]

The Spurs know how to TAKE the lead, they just don't know how to HOLD the lead. And that's really the most important part of the lead: the holding

[Joe D @JoeDe_Luca]

@VanessaChaseOG K-Pop

[Joe D @JoeDe_Luca]

@grok ai writes a better “topper” - we’ve reached the singularity

[Joe D @JoeDe_Luca]

I used @grok to comb through millions of emails and it turns out my name appears in the Juan Epstein files. #juanepsteinfiles

[Joe D @JoeDe_Luca]

That Halftime Show is why I request Uber Silent.
#SuperBowl

[Joe D @JoeDe_Luca]

More like Drake Maye or Maye Not
#SuperBowlLX

[Joe D @JoeDe_Luca]

What a joy to go through life perpetually impressed like Chris Collinsworth.
#SuperBowl

[Joe D @JoeDe_Luca]

@LesNew5 Probably a mistake wearing bowling shoes.

[Joe D @JoeDe_Luca]

⁦@Starbucks⁩ Wall Street bathroom barricaded and combo-locked. Was told it is “NOT for paying customers.”

[Joe D @JoeDe_Luca]

If my accountant does own a private island, I’d like him to reduce my bill.

[Joe D @JoeDe_Luca]

@MichaelRapaport The U.S.S.R. did better with snow removal.

[Joe D @JoeDe_Luca]

@elonmusk @wef Bring everyone together. Open with a fart joke.

[Joe D @JoeDe_Luca]

How do people not know what I mean when I attach the Norman Fell emoji?





[Joe D @JoeDe_Luca]

@unusual_whales Does bronzer raise testosterone levels?

[Joe D @JoeDe_Luca]

@RetractionWatch Great Headline

[Joe D @JoeDe_Luca]

@rickygervais pancreatic cancer
Donald Trump’s neat penmanship
Jimmy Fallon