Jonah Hill

Im NOT affiliated with Jonah Hill, but I will make you laugh harder then ever. Follow for best sayings and jokes daily! Business Contact: [email protected]

[Jonah Hill @JonahHillFun]

Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.

[Jonah Hill @JonahHillFun]

My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right.

[Jonah Hill @JonahHillFun]

#PalePeopleProblems Constantly being asked "Are you feeling ok? You look really pale..."

[Jonah Hill @JonahHillFun]

#ThingsIdRatherDoThanListenToBieber Superglue crocs to my feet

[Jonah Hill @JonahHillFun]

#ThingsIdRatherDoThanListenToBieber ... Like My Own Facebook Status .

[Jonah Hill @JonahHillFun]

#ThingsIdRatherDoThanListenToBieber:watch Ray J n Nick Cannon have a rap battle

[Jonah Hill @JonahHillFun]

Hospitality: making your guests feel like they're at home, even if you wish they were.

[Jonah Hill @JonahHillFun]

We have enough gun control. What we need is idiot control.

[Jonah Hill @JonahHillFun]

A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.

[Jonah Hill @JonahHillFun]

He who smiles in a crisis has found someone to blame.

[Jonah Hill @JonahHillFun]

Student: "Should I get in trouble for something I didn't do?" Teacher: "No" Student: "Good, cause I didn't do my homework."

[Jonah Hill @JonahHillFun]

Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.

[Jonah Hill @JonahHillFun]

Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.

[Jonah Hill @JonahHillFun]

#InstantTurnOn lip biting,grabbing, whispering, neck kissing...

[Jonah Hill @JonahHillFun]

It's not the fall that kills you; it's the sudden stop at the end.

[Jonah Hill @JonahHillFun]

Amare Stoudemire as the Hulk. #AthletesAsAvengers

[Jonah Hill @JonahHillFun]

Never get into fights with ugly people, they have nothing to lose.

[Jonah Hill @JonahHillFun]

Laugh at your problems, everybody else does.

[Jonah Hill @JonahHillFun]

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.

[Jonah Hill @JonahHillFun]

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.