Judson Pooper

Everyone poops. Our goal: the enlightenment of the entire student body here at Judson U. Happy pooping.

[Judson Pooper @JudsonPooper]

Pooping at church: sacrilege or “come as you are” humility?

[Judson Pooper @JudsonPooper]

To all the AirPods that have ever tragically met their fate in the toilet: we salute the fallen.

[Judson Pooper @JudsonPooper]

The term “backsplash” doesn’t make me think of my kitchen.

[Judson Pooper @JudsonPooper]

Even if they smell the peanut butter, they will have to live with the fact that they got close enough to smell the questionable substance.

[Judson Pooper @JudsonPooper]

Want to spook someone this spooky season? Get a dab of peanut butter and smear it on the toilet paper holder in your stall. #spooky #spookypoop

[Judson Pooper @JudsonPooper]

Feeling conflicted about the near-universal usage of terms for excrement as expletives. Pooping is an enjoyable pastime, just like eating or playing board games. It’s time to start changing our public discourse to reflect that.

Hoping the new administration will act on this. 🙏

[Judson Pooper @JudsonPooper]

S/O to the ones who don’t roll up their sleeves before they wipe.

They are the real risk takers.

[Judson Pooper @JudsonPooper]

One of the greatest travesties of Western cultural privacy: never knowing how your wiping skills compare to the rest of the world. I mean, you could be the best wiper in the world and never know it 🤷‍♂️

[Judson Pooper @JudsonPooper]

Or, to take it up a notch: pooping with ALL doors open.

Yes, including the front door.

[Judson Pooper @JudsonPooper]

Arguably the best part of mandatory isolation?

Pooping with the door open.

[Judson Pooper @JudsonPooper]

Save TP. Poop only in public restrooms. #hometoiletadvantagelost

[Judson Pooper @JudsonPooper]

Spicy nuggs go in...spicy nuggs come out. @Wendys

[Judson Pooper @JudsonPooper]

Chili season: when you willingly accept that each poop is about to be hotter than a thousand burning suns.

[Judson Pooper @JudsonPooper]

If you could only have one...

#poll #survey #toiletpaper

[Judson Pooper @JudsonPooper]

@papercraness @JUGazebo Seriously

[Judson Pooper @JudsonPooper]

Yes, I graduated a long time ago. Yes, I still think of tweets about poop and feel compelled to share them...regularly. #poopjoke #stillhere #stillpooping

[Judson Pooper @JudsonPooper]

When you fart really loud in an empty bathroom...

...and someone in a stall stifles a laugh.

#mydaysofar

[Judson Pooper @JudsonPooper]

@JU_JSO @JudsonU I’ll give you a little while to decide whether you really want to do this. If so... #getready 💩

[Judson Pooper @JudsonPooper]

@Chris_Lash @JUGazebo @guitarguychip @JU_JSO Hey, better late than not at all #justlikepooping

[Judson Pooper @JudsonPooper]

Shoutout to all my followers. Pooping is a beautiful experience and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Stay strong. Stay regular. 🙌🏼