Jum'ah🌺

Growing quietly 🌿.
just vibing 🌸 life, laughs & soft wins ✨

[Gold🤍🌚 @GOLDBABYO]

My cousin found an AirTag hidden under her car, and the person who put it there was someone she had trusted for years. It started when her iPhone sent an alert saying an unknown AirTag had been moving with her. She laughed at first, “Probably someone’s AirTag on the bus.”

But the alert appeared again the next morning. Then again after work. That’s when she showed me, “It followed me from my apartment to work.”

[UYI @miz_uyik]

I was halfway through a flight when the man beside me asked to borrow my boarding pass.

Not my phone.

Not a pen.

My boarding pass.

"I just need to check something," he said.

I laughed.

"It has my name on it."

"I know."

"So why do you need it?"

He looked toward the front of the plane.

"To make sure they gave you the right seat."

I thought he was joking.

I handed it over.

He studied it for a few seconds, then quietly handed it back.

Without looking at me, he said,

"You should've been in 18A."

I was sitting in 18F.

[Gold🤍🌚 @GOLDBABYO]

My delivery driver sent me a photo of my package sitting outside my front door. The problem was, that wasn’t my front door. I immediately messaged him, “Hi, I think you delivered my package to the wrong house.”

He replied, “No, I delivered to the address provided.” I sent him a photo of my actual front door. “I’m literally standing outside. There’s nothing here.”

He stopped responding. The package contained a $900 laptop I’d ordered for work, so I called customer service immediately. The agent looked at the delivery photo and said, “According to our system, it was delivered successfully.”

[Gold🤍🌚 @GOLDBABYO]

My uncle ended up in the ER because someone at his office decided his food allergy was “probably exaggerated.” He had a severe peanut allergy, and everyone on his team knew it. He never made a big deal about it, but he always asked what was in shared food before eating anything.

Last Friday, one of his coworkers brought homemade cookies to the office. My uncle asked him directly, “Do these have peanuts or peanut butter in them?” He said, “Nope, you’re good.”

My uncle ate half of one. Less than five minutes later, he stopped talking and grabbed his throat. Someone shouted for his EpiPen while another coworker called an ambulance.

[Gold🤍🌚 @GOLDBABYO]

My coworker’s boyfriend’s mother told her she was “wasting her son’s time” because she has PCOS and might struggle to have children. She didn’t even say it behind her back. They were having dinner at his mother’s house when she looked directly at my coworker and said, “So when are you two giving me grandchildren?”

My coworker laughed awkwardly. “Hopefully someday. I have PCOS, so it might take a little longer for us.”

Her smile disappeared. “What’s PCOS?” My coworker explained it briefly.

[TheHost @TheHost_]

A pregnant woman on the plane got sick and collapsed. I gave her my business class seat to rest.
I sat in economy for 4 hours. When we landed, I went to grab my bag and she stared at me. My bag felt heavy. I unzipped it and went pale.

She had the audacity to stuff my bag with everything from the business class seat — the blanket, the pillow, the amenity kit, the snacks, both bottles of drinks, even the slippers. Every single thing she could grab.

[Gold🤍🌚 @GOLDBABYO]

Today I had an appointment with a woman that was supposed to be my new psych doctor. I informed her of my decade old ADHD diagnosis. Her face seemed to turn sour a bit but I continued on. I told her when I was in grade school I was in the gifted program. Her face turned even more so I decided to step off the soapbox of my life’s greatest hits for a moment to let her say what her face clearly is trying to.

I paused long enough for her to deem it appropriate to interject:

[Gold🤍🌚 @GOLDBABYO]

ADHD rejection sensitivity makes one changed tone feel like proof I was never wanted. I’m exhausted from masking, rereading texts, and bracing for abandonment. Maybe the child in me wasn’t too much she was just always scared love could disappear.

[Gold🤍🌚 @GOLDBABYO]

I moved my 82-year-old grandfather into assisted living after he left the stove on for the third time in one month. The morning I dropped him off, he refused to unpack his suitcase and said, “Just leave it closed. I’m not staying long enough to need any of that.”

I drove away feeling like I had betrayed the man who practically raised me.

For the next five months, I visited every Sunday, and every Sunday he complained about the food, the television, the nurses, and the fact that nobody there knew how to play chess properly.

Then one afternoon, the facility manager called me. She said, “I need to ask you something strange. Did your grandfather used to be a teacher?” I told her he had taught high school mathematics for almost 40 years. She laughed and said, “That explains it.”

[Gold🤍🌚 @GOLDBABYO]

I was 14 when my mum’s new boyfriend offered to start picking me up from school because she was working late shifts. Everyone thought he was amazing. My aunt kept saying, “Your mum finally found a good man.”

He bought groceries, fixed things around the house, and never missed church with us on Sundays. Then one afternoon, he took a different route home. That was the first time he touched me.

I didn’t tell my mum for almost a year because I was terrified she wouldn’t believe me.

[SILVER @Read_Meee]

My daughter got a receptionist job at a luxury car dealership. She is a freash faced girl next door type. A slick realestate Chad slid his card across her desk and said call me. She slid it back and said my Mom told me l will never need to call a man. 👏Please tell me how you are raising your daughter right.

[TheHost @TheHost_]

My neighbor asked to borrow my pressure washer "for two hours" to clean his patio. That was six months ago.

Yesterday, I finally saw it sitting in his driveway and walked over to grab it.

He blocked the path, looked me dead in the eye, and said, "You can’t just take that. I'm in the middle of a project."

I laughed, thinking it was a joke. "Greg, it’s my $400 DeWalt. You’ve had it since October."

"Yeah, and I changed the spark plug and bought fresh gas for it," he said, crossing his arms.

[Ayomiposi✍️ @jokotagbaposi]

My wife died in a car accident three years ago.

Last week, I was cleaning my 8-year-old daughter’s room when I found a birthday card hidden under her mattress.

It was signed…

“Love you forever, Mommy.”

The date on the card was from last month.

🧵👇

[Jum'ah🌺 @JustJumah8]

The coach wanted my permission to set up a real scholarship fund in my daughter’s name so other girls wouldn’t fall through the cracks the way Priya almost did. My daughter found out I knew when she got home and thought she was in trouble. She’s not.

[Jum'ah🌺 @JustJumah8]

My daughter’s swim coach asked to speak with me after practice, and I assumed she wanted to talk about my daughter missing two meets last month. Instead she asked why my daughter had been quietly paying the monthly fees for another girl on the team,

[Jum'ah🌺 @JustJumah8]

The coach wasn’t upset. She said Priya’s mother had come in that week, ready to pull her daughter from the team out of guilt over not knowing who to thank, and the office finally told her because they didn’t think it was fair to let the mystery become a burden.

[Jum'ah🌺 @JustJumah8]

ones, and instead of saying anything, she started using her babysitting money to cover Priya’s dues directly with the front office, asking them not to say who it came from. She’d been doing it for four months out of a savings account I thought was for a car.

[Gold🤍🌚 @GOLDBABYO]

A waiter ruined a marriage at my restaurant last night with one sentence: “Sir, your wife was here yesterday too… but she wasn’t with you.”

The whole table went silent. The husband looked at his wife. “You were here yesterday?” She stared at the waiter. “No, I wasn’t.”

The waiter immediately realized something was wrong. “Oh. Sorry. I must be mistaken.” But the husband wasn’t letting it go. “You just said she was here.”

[Emmanuel @zara_praise]

You can outrun the police but you can't outrun RoboCop

[Emmanuel....i ⚕️ @AshE_Nuel]

Monday morning just dry over here