Yes, because no matter how much you want someone, you eventually realize that love alone cannot carry a relationship without consistency, communication, reassurance, and emotional availability. Being with someone avoidant and inconsistent can slowly drain you because you’re constantly trying to understand where you stand, overanalyzing their actions, making excuses for their distance, and holding onto potential instead of reality.
At some point, you have to choose peace over attachment. Because wanting someone deeply does not automatically mean they are healthy for you. And honestly, one of the saddest things is loving someone who only shows up when it’s convenient for them emotionally.
You can empathize with why someone is avoidant and still acknowledge that their behavior is hurting you. Understanding someone’s trauma, fears, or emotional patterns should not require abandoning your own emotional needs in the process.
Sometimes leaving is not because you stopped loving them, but because you finally realized you cannot keep carrying a relationship by yourself while hoping the other person eventually becomes ready to meet you halfway.
My ex reached out to me after months of no contact. He confessed that I’m still the person he thinks about and misses every single day. He said he kept suppressing the urge to message me or even greet me on my birthday because he wanted to move on—but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t, even though he’s already in a new relationship. I’ll admit, during our relationship, I loved him deeply. When we broke up, it honestly felt like my whole world collapsed.
I’m not looking for an apology.
But I do hope that one day, you actually feel the weight of how you treated me.
Not right now,
Not anytime soon.
But on some random night when it’s quiet and you’re alone with your thoughts…
I hope it finally hits you.
@SegodiTlour Was talking to this guy for literally a day and he was can he come see me at night I was just stunned that people still did that coming out of a 3 year relationship 😭😭I just noticed nothing has changed people are still weird😂😫
A 19-year-old in France went into a coma for 3 weeks. To her, it lasted 7 years. She gave birth to triplets, named them, and lost one shortly after birth. She woke up and asked the nurses where her children were.
Doctors see this often in intensive care. They call it ICU delirium, and it hits about 37% of patients there. For people on a breathing machine for weeks, the rate climbs to nearly 9 in 10.
The drugs that keep ICU patients unconscious push down the deepest sleep stages, where the brain normally files away the day. When the drugs ease off, all that suppressed dreaming floods back at once. Meanwhile, the brain stops double-checking reality. So the brain just builds, stacking vivid detail on vivid detail. Half an hour of dream time can feel like a whole year of life.
The grief follows her out of the coma. The brain regions that handle emotional pain are the same ones that hurt when you lose someone in waking life. Memories don’t come with a “this was real” tag. So the love a mother feels for children who never existed lives in the same place as the love for kids who did. Grief counselors handle these losses the way they would the death of an actual child, because to the brain, they are the same.
A novelist named Caroline Leavitt wrote about her own coma for Psychology Today in 2021. She said waking up felt like being “pulled violently” from one world to another. Drug-induced comas like hers leave the brain active enough to dream. In trauma comas, the brain mostly goes dark.
In Rick and Morty there’s an arcade game called Roy where you live a whole life in an afternoon. The brain runs the same game on its own. All it needs is a breathing machine and 3 weeks.
If you want to know if your relationship will last, don't watch how you fight.
Watch what happens after a terrible fight.
There are three possible reactions.
Only one leads to forever.
Dating someone with avoidant attachment is not a challenge to overcome. It is a cycle that will slowly dismantle your self-worth. Because the closer you get, the more they pull back. And the more they pull back, the harder you chase. And the harder you chase, the more suffocated they claim to feel. And suddenly you are the problem. You are too needy. You are too intense. You want too much. When in reality you just wanted a person who could stay present without panicking.
That is the nightmare. Not the distance itself. But what the distance does to you over time. You start shrinking your needs to make them comfortable. You stop bringing up how you feel because you already know it will create tension. You celebrate the smallest crumbs of affection because you have been starved long enough to find them meaningful. You become a person who is grateful just to not be pushed away today.
And they are not doing this intentionally. That is what makes it so exhausting. They genuinely do not know how to show up consistently. Intimacy triggers them. Vulnerability shuts them down. The moment a relationship starts to feel real, something in them activates and retreats. So you are not fighting a person. You are fighting a wall that has been built long before you arrived.
But here is what nobody tells you, you cannot love that wall down. You cannot be patient enough, understanding enough, or available enough to fix an attachment wound that they have never once decided to address.
Dating an avoidant person is a nightmare because you will lose yourself trying to win someone who was never fully there to begin with.
1. Our skeletons are wet.
2. your nose is ALWAYS in your line of sight, but your brain ignores it
3. When you receive a donated kidney, they don’t take out the bad one. They just add the good one in.
4. Your immune system doesn't know you have eyes. Otherwise, it would attack them and make you blind. injuring one eye can introduce eye bits to the bloodstream and basically give your immune system the knowledge of having eyes. then it might decide it really fucking hates that and attack your non-injured eye.
5. The quality of the male sperm is responsible for morning sickness, preeclampsia, baby’s gender and almost every single pregnancy related issue.
6. You breathe through one nostril at a time. Don’t believe me? Put your finger below your nose and try.
7. The brain itself has no nerve endings, so it can’t feel pain. That’s why patients can be wide awake during brain surgery and made to perform certain actions.
8. That ringing in silence isn’t silence
When everything is quiet and you hear a faint ringing?
That’s your brain listening to its own nervous system.
You are hearing yourself functioning.
9. You will never experience your own death.
You only experience approaching it… Then nothing.
Everyone else gets closure, stories, funerals, and memories.
You don’t.
You never know you’ve become a memory.
From your perspective, the story just stops mid-sentence.
First trailer for ‘ONE NIGHT ONLY’, starring Monica Barbaro and Callum Turner.
The film is a rom-com version of ‘The Purge’ where premarital sex is outlawed except for one night every year.
In theaters on August 7.
The first teaser trailer for the film adaptation of Colleen Hoover’s ‘VERITY’ has been released.
Starring Anne Hathaway, Dakota Johnson, and Josh Hartnett.
In theatres October 2.