Jeff V.

Decker. Make a note.

[Jeff V. @Jvwald]

@sgcarney

[Jeff V. @Jvwald]

I’ve quoted Romancing the Stone every time I’ve made a campfire since 1984.

[Jeff V. @Jvwald]

Driving a car is pretty much like riding a bike. They both get you from one place to the other.

[Jeff V. @Jvwald]

"What a beautiful view! Here, get a photo of me exercising in front of it."--people who do yoga.

[Jeff V. @Jvwald]

I haven't tweeted since 1985.

[Jeff V. @Jvwald]

@HighsmithV so you'll stop asking?

[Jeff V. @Jvwald]

.@HighsmithV Yes, I will go to cross fit with you and drink Michelob Ultras.

[Jeff V. @Jvwald]

Sounds like the latest book from @sgcarney is getting a lot of... exposure?
https://t.co/Ts2wZKSDuU

[Jeff V. @Jvwald]

I'm friends with Snapchat on MySpace.

[Jeff V. @Jvwald]

I thought the mannequin challenge was to design the best department store window displays with the help of your wacky sidekick Hollywood.

[Jeff V. @Jvwald]

Canning is jarring.

[Jeff V. @Jvwald]

I'll have the chile con carne with meat and a café au lait with milk.

[Jeff V. @Jvwald]

I don't rant on Twitter. I rant via text to @HighsmithV.

[Jeff V. @Jvwald]

That jostling around of the seatback in front of you that tells you that mother fucker is about to recline.

[Jeff V. @Jvwald]

I'll bet that when Hulk changes back into a human, he has to take a massive shit.

[Jeff V. @Jvwald]

I don't pay for @tinder Plus but I would if it let me filter out hairdressers and girls with weird names.

[Jeff V. @Jvwald]

.@realDonaldTrump You're welcome to campaign here without protest. #democracy

You're also welcome to go fuck yourself. #1stamendment

[Jeff V. @Jvwald]

Two people talking in the future:

"You still read ebooks?"

"Yeah I guess just like the feel of a real screen."

[Jeff V. @Jvwald]

Everyone cancelled on brunch.

So now I don't know what to do with those tossed salads and scrambled eggs.

[Jeff V. @Jvwald]

@SYSKPodcast How about a shout out at the show tonight in Denver for my 10th birthday? It was 30 years ago.