𝒹𝒶𝓇𝓎𝓃

fuck around and find out

[𝒹𝒶𝓇𝓎𝓃 @KARMABATEMAN]

@Corpse_Husband @CORPSE 🥲

[𝒹𝒶𝓇𝓎𝓃 @KARMABATEMAN]

If someone’s tailgating you on the freeway, chances are you’re going fast enough that if you wash your windows, the tailgating prick behind you gets to wash their windows too. 😀👍🏻

[𝒹𝒶𝓇𝓎𝓃 @KARMABATEMAN]

When I was younger I made a contract for my friends to sign that listed out rules for being my friend. My grandma told me I shouldn’t give people rules to be friends with me.

25+ years later and why the fuck not? Those weren’t rules they were boundaries I wish would’ve held. 🤷🏻‍♀️

[𝒹𝒶𝓇𝓎𝓃 @KARMABATEMAN]

Just killed the mosquito that’s been ruining my life for the last I don’t know maybe a month?

Sorry not sorry, Pleakly 🤷🏻‍♀️

[Meidas_Charise Lee @charise_lee]

“we had a baby” who is WE ? 😂

[𝒹𝒶𝓇𝓎𝓃 @KARMABATEMAN]

Dear 2nd grader class who would’ve graduated in 2013 who potentially went to Kirk Adam’s ES and attended the spelling bee…

I know how the fuck to spell “course” now you can all leave me alone and get out of my head, thanks

Sincerely, 2nd place

[𝒹𝒶𝓇𝓎𝓃 @KARMABATEMAN]

Watch, I’ll do what y’all are so desperate for me to do and once I do you’re going to feel so fucking stupid because I’ve been right this whole fucking time.

Boy who cried wolf my fucking ass. That was so fucking rude and uncalled for

[𝒹𝒶𝓇𝓎𝓃 @KARMABATEMAN]

Dan and Phil official?? 👀

[AriZona Iced Tea @DrinkAriZona]

AriZona Iced Tea

[max :) @max_aries__]

twitter porn doesn’t hit like it used to

[𝒹𝒶𝓇𝓎𝓃 @KARMABATEMAN]

The Super Summer Theatre is putting on Legally Blonde the Musical in August.

BRB losing my shit

[D🤎 @xodarianesq]

Shout out to all the girlies like me who were told they were quick learners growing up and now get anxiety when they don’t understand something the first time 🙃

[𝒹𝒶𝓇𝓎𝓃 @KARMABATEMAN]

I’ve made it, ma