Sayona

funny lady

[Sayona @KSayonak]

Just in case you ever wondered what you would have done during the terrors of Nazi Germany, which side you would have chosen. You’re living it now. This is our generation’s Nazi Germany. #FreePalesitine

[Sayona @KSayonak]

After binge watching 11 seasons of a true crime series I can confidently give you 3 pieces of advice:
1) do not, I repeat, do not light up a room!
2) go to @Walmart every day. They have the best cctv system will solve your murder
3) stay away from men, they will murder you

[Sayona @KSayonak]

I’m sorry but if your kids haven’t broken your will to live then we can’t be friends. #kids

[Sayona @KSayonak]

Me when I was younger: I’m so likable!!! I have so many friends 🥳
Me Now: Why am I so likable??? No!! No new friends.

[Sayona @KSayonak]

Friend texts: How’s life with 4 kids?
Me text back: Amazing!!! (while hiding from my family in the tools section of our garage)

[Sayona @KSayonak]

He’s a 10 but he uses the crosswalk signal to cross a busy street. #hesa2sis

[Sayona @KSayonak]

Not to brag but my doctor just told me I’m her favorite patient, so basically i just won therapy 🥇

[Sayona @KSayonak]

Me (under my breath): God I can’t stand this person!
Person I’m referring to: Also me

[Sayona @KSayonak]

I’m feeling 💯…but like 100 years old

[Sayona @KSayonak]

Today I discovered that 90% of my personality is a trauma response, so… Anyway have a great weekend 🎉

[Sayona @KSayonak]

I get so uncomfortable when people use the term “the good ole days”. Like ma’am unless you’re talking about the days when women could poison their husbands and blame it on the plague then i have no idea what you’re talking about

[Sayona @KSayonak]

Honestly if your phone is not on DND at 3 am when I send you that hilarious TikTok, that’s you problem that you. will have to resolve

[Sayona @KSayonak]

Do you think gurgly voice people just woke up one day and were like “Eff it I’m not clearing my throat ANyMore 🤬”#letmeclearmythroat

[Sayona @KSayonak]

Imagine dating someone without a library card? Eek. Ok Neanderthal!

[Sayona @KSayonak]

From Tesla to a big ole Messla #RIPTwitter #eattherich

[Sayona @KSayonak]

@Phil_Lewis_ Hulu? Honey we are taking this hot mess right to MGM!
I even have a name: From Tesla to Messla

[Sayona @KSayonak]

Good bye Twitter 🐦 maybe you’ll be here tomorrow, maybe you won’t. It’s was nice while it lasted, n’est pas? #ByeTwitter

[Sayona @KSayonak]

Khloe Baby name prediction: TRUST @khloekardashian

[Sayona @KSayonak]

Portland’s roads and highway exits were designed by a lunatic! Please discuss lol #portland