big Wayne 🤠

I once was lost but now I'm just blind- Kid Rock

[big Wayne 🤠 @KWHarper]

You all better have flipped off that China balloon today, it was our duty as Americans

[Danny Vietti @DannyVietti]

Fewest stolen bases allowed in MLB since 2005:

1.) Cardinals: 886 SB

*a huge gap*

2.) Diamondbacks: 1,310 SB
3.) Royals: 1,351 SB
4.) Twins: 1,407 SB
5.) Orioles: 1,436 SB
5.) Astros: 1,436 SB

Yadier Molina’s first full season: 2005

[Baseball Quotes @BaseballQuotes1]

690 FOR THE MACHINE

[Yee Yee Apparel @YeeYeeApparel]

I bet Luke Combs can't buy 2 12 packs and a tank of gas with that $100 he won off that lottery ticket anymore.

[ESPN @espn]

Nolan Arenado had a special message for Albert Pujols:

"I love you, man. You're one of the greatest to ever play this game. I hope you get to go out the right way. ... I hope you hear this one day because you're my favorite player."

[big Wayne 🤠 @KWHarper]

They call me king turd up here on shit mountain, but if you want it you can have the crown

[big Wayne 🤠 @KWHarper]

I said I’m sorry mama for my vices, But you’ll never understand what my life is

[big Wayne 🤠 @KWHarper]

I hope the snow gets ass deep to a tall Indian

[Drunk Fredbird @DrunkFredbird]

Sources say the selling point for Arenado is that Matt Holiday set out a Coors Light and a Budweiser and told him “You know which is best.”

They both shotgunned an ice cold Bud Heavy and it was set in stone.

I will not reveal my sources. But trust me when I say “Trust me.”

[Kyle Becker @kylenabecker]

I'd have to guess about 95% of Americans who mainstream media call "far-right" want only to work for a living, keep most of their money, raise their kids in peace, get them a good education without left-wing indoctrination, own a nice home & be left alone. You know, "extremists."

[big Wayne 🤠 @KWHarper]

Never thought it would happen to me, but this hard living ain’t as easy as it used to be

[big Wayne 🤠 @KWHarper]

Sometimes it amazes me that I got out alive, because I done everything Hank did but die

[big Wayne 🤠 @KWHarper]

Whether you like President Trump or not, you gotta admit, sometimes he’s pretty funny.

[big Wayne 🤠 @KWHarper]

Katy: I’m gonna get to work at 7:30...
Alarm goes off
Katy: Ehh I’ll leave here at 7:30...
Alarm goes off
Katy: I’ll get up at 7:30...

Alarm goes off
Katy: shit I’m late

What I hear every morning I am still home for the series of morning alarms

[big Wayne 🤠 @KWHarper]

I think about Tobacco juice and Mason jars of shine, I think about the vices I’ve let take me over time

[Wise Michael Jordan @itsMichaelJ]

Life isn't about waiting for the storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.

[big Wayne 🤠 @KWHarper]

Looting and riots have became OK, a little bit of meth and tigers makes a straight dude gay and that bitch Carol Baskin was the one that got away

[big Wayne 🤠 @KWHarper]

I think Bran might be spending too much time with grandma Betty I came in the house earlier and he was sitting alone watching The bold and beautiful

[big Wayne 🤠 @KWHarper]

Lesson of the day, Katy does not like it when i wake her up to help me get my new grill out of a turd and or toad floater