somebody’s hott mom 👑

Marijuana Mommy/Bartender/Fuck the Patriarchy 🏳️‍🌈

[somebody’s hott mom 👑 @KalSwag]

I’m a good mother first & whatever I do second is none of your fucking business.

[somebody’s hott mom 👑 @KalSwag]

Scream singing Jolene at 9:30 in the morning it therapy, mom.

[somebody’s hott mom 👑 @KalSwag]

Honeybun 🍩✨🤍

[somebody’s hott mom 👑 @KalSwag]

I think my god complex is the only thing keeping me alive these days. Just me and my narcissism wobbling through life 🫡

[somebody’s hott mom 👑 @KalSwag]

@oganXX Surprisingly no 😂😂😂😂 that’s happened before though. 😂

[somebody’s hott mom 👑 @KalSwag]

Why your married ass liking thirst traps of mine from 2022? Go make your wife breakfast you pig.

[somebody’s hott mom 👑 @KalSwag]

Sometimes at work I feel like Regina George..and I like it. 🙄

[somebody’s hott mom 👑 @KalSwag]

Let the healing era begin. 🤞🏼

[somebody’s hott mom 👑 @KalSwag]

10 AM manic depression tweeting.

[somebody’s hott mom 👑 @KalSwag]

I replied “it’s pretty simple, no one one on the road actually knows you. You get to pretend. Once you get to know people, you don’t like them”

[somebody’s hott mom 👑 @KalSwag]

A guy at my bar said “I never understand why you meet the best people when you’re on the road but everyone hates everyone in their hometown”

[somebody’s hott mom 👑 @KalSwag]

Just me, by myself, just keep the serial killer at bay until I’ve finished the bottle. I want to trip when he’s chasing me.

[somebody’s hott mom 👑 @KalSwag]

You know what’s not fun? Not being able to express yourself because if you step over that hill you’ll be so fucking mean that someone will never speak to you again.

[somebody’s hott mom 👑 @KalSwag]

@markeefarler Let’s do something together soon. ❤️‍🩹

[somebody’s hott mom 👑 @KalSwag]

Why she’s my favorite 🥹😂

[somebody’s hott mom 👑 @KalSwag]

You’re on your own kid, you always have been.

[somebody’s hott mom 👑 @KalSwag]

I used to kind of make fun of people who were upset about their parents getting divorced when they are adults. Now I see.

[DECKI @bydecki]

him: r u stupid
me:

[somebody’s hott mom 👑 @KalSwag]

@oganXX AAAAAHHHH. I’m only on season 7 and I’m frothing at the mouth.

[somebody’s hott mom 👑 @KalSwag]

Taking small t breaks is ruining my life.

[somebody’s hott mom 👑 @KalSwag]

😅🥰