Delaney

[Delaney @Keelan_Lynch]

I’ve spent the past 18 days without any heating or air with sub freezing temps almost daily and they finally got it working today. I’m so thankful 😭😭 — and also perplexed as to how the pipes actually managed to hold up.

[Delaney @Keelan_Lynch]

When your new doctor calls you a walking miracle because the medication you’ve been on for several years now should have never been prescribed to you due to your medical history & highly increased risk of stroke.

[Delaney @Keelan_Lynch]

Why would I play wordle when I can just try to decipher charges on my bank account instead. I spent two days trying to figure out what ATS was, only to remember I went to America’s Thrift Store last weekend.

[Delaney @Keelan_Lynch]

Read this as “team snacks” and thought no way the Penn State moms are beating us in that 😭

[Ole Miss Rewind @OleMissRewind]

fun fact: ole miss is fifth nationally in team sacks

[Delaney @Keelan_Lynch]

@LoganAnthony24 Hotty toddy my boy

[Delaney @Keelan_Lynch]

This game is giving me flashbacks to my finance professor spending a whole lesson on how not to to hire escorts.

[Delaney @Keelan_Lynch]

There’s just something about refilling my dog’s water bowl with a carafe and yelling, “bottomless mimosassss,” that gets my dog hype every time.

[Delaney @Keelan_Lynch]

The wedding invite I’m going to this weekend specified semi formal attire but requested that no one wear anything within the color wheel of Navy, blue, grey, or silver, and I’m now wondering what the men are going to piece together.

[Delaney @Keelan_Lynch]

I love facebook marketplace

[Delaney @Keelan_Lynch]

Lol not @TMobile home internet saying all my data has been used. Checked the usage and half the days are ones I was out of town and didn’t have a single device connected. Y’all got me joked.

[Delaney @Keelan_Lynch]

My favorite bit since moving into this house is trying to adjust the shower wall jets to reach me. They either shoot straight over my shoulders or directly into my eyes like a chemistry lab’s eye wash station. Idk why I keep thinking the outcome will be different if I try again.

[Delaney @Keelan_Lynch]

Roll tide am I right

[Delaney @Keelan_Lynch]

Been sitting a mile away from the AL 1-20 62 exit for over an hour now. Home arrival keeps being pushed back by the hour. 3+ hour delay getting home so far. So thankful that in these trying times I have holes in my bladder so excess fluid can leak out.

[Delaney @Keelan_Lynch]

2.5+ hours standstill. Apparently major trees down southbound causing the closure. Debating peeing outside with my dog.

[Delaney @Keelan_Lynch]

My truest toxic trait is thinking that the way I burp as if I’m having an exorcist performed on me will deter strangers from wanting to attack my home.

[Delaney @Keelan_Lynch]

The self restraint it takes to not call my brother-in-law Mr. Egg Head when he sends a picture in the family group chat is painful. Can we please normalize tormenting male pattern baldness without guilt?

[Delaney @Keelan_Lynch]

Love when my dorky friends join adult kickball leagues so I can tell them to go kick balls.

[Delaney @Keelan_Lynch]

I want my summer readings to be enticed by pizza like the good ole days. Can we Book It for adults, @pizzahut ?

[Delaney @Keelan_Lynch]

My dad wrapping up a phone call, “So anyways, I had just seen a Subaru slammed into a guard rail on the interstate and thought of you. Just thought I’d check in — see how you were doing. Love you, sweetheart.”

[Delaney @Keelan_Lynch]

I stay in the loop of local cycling and running clubs solely so I know where they are in geographic proximity to my wanders, i.e., where to avoid or proceed with caution.