Kelly T

It's difficult to look good while flossing.

[Kelly T @KellyComingIn]

Make up your mind. Unless you've lost it ofcourse.

[Kelly T @KellyComingIn]

20 Pics Of People Caught In An Agonizing Moment That Will Make You Feel Slightly Less Numbed For Three Seconds!

[Kelly T @KellyComingIn]

If you could turn off depression tweets, I'd have to make decisions on a day-to-day basis.

[Kelly T @KellyComingIn]

I'm gonna have one glass of wine now and save the rest of the bottle for also now.

[Kelly T @KellyComingIn]

How long can you be right on the verge of sneezing? I think I'm on day six now.

[Kelly T @KellyComingIn]

Note to self: You should have just remebered this, moron.

[Kelly T @KellyComingIn]

I just learned about the word "postjudiced". Seeing how I always know best, it feels like I got my hands on kryptonite.

[Kelly T @KellyComingIn]

I'm having some difficulties balancing my time budget. It's weird because my income hasn't changed.

[Kelly T @KellyComingIn]

When did the internet become all about telling me I've done everything wrong all my life?

[ceej @ceejoyner]

The one thing egg nog enthusiasts, magicians, DEA agents, and satanists can agree on is the turtleneck.

[Kelly T @KellyComingIn]

The world's tallest mermaid.

[Kelly T @KellyComingIn]

Defrost means "to voluntarily wait salivating for longer than necessary" in microwave.

[Kelly T @KellyComingIn]

SPOILER ALERT

The Revenant is pretty much when Leo is incapacitated in Wolf of Wall Street except it's a bear and not quaaludes.

[Kelly T @KellyComingIn]

S IN SCENE: "You're just the silent letter anyway!"
C IN SCENE: "Am not! You're the silent letter, snaky piece of shit!"

[Kelly T @KellyComingIn]

The best part of sneezing with headphones on is getting to listen to music at a godzillion decibels for a split second.

[Kelly T @KellyComingIn]

This responsibility thing is getting out of hand. I'm pretty sure I don't want any of it.

[Kelly T @KellyComingIn]

I suck at flirting. And other eye contact sports such as social interaction.

[Kelly T @KellyComingIn]

Me: I have three things to do but only time for one.
Brain: Do no things.
Me: (sighing with obviously feigned reluctancy) OK then...

[Kelly T @KellyComingIn]

[on the phone with customer services]

So what would the fee for shipping only be? I'm planning to do all the handling myself.

[Kelly T @KellyComingIn]

Agreed!