don't know who needs to hear this, but start living. the days are flying by, and all you do is work, pay bills, and stress. enjoy what you can - walks, sunsets, music, laughter and nature. joy doesn't have to be expensive. you deserve it.
Get your bloodwork done! I had a Vitamin D deficiency that altered my moods, motivation, and functionality. I thought it was depression but it was my lack of Vitamin D.. it is no joke and the deficiency is most common in melanated skin.