Krust

[Krust @Kmart_layaway]

Me: mirror mirror on the wall, who's the most reflective one of all?
Mirror: *blushes*

[Krust @Kmart_layaway]

Love is Blind can save the show and make it as popular as it was in 2020 if they just film a season in the Northeast. Do a season in Worcester. I would pay good money to watch that. #LoveIsBlind6

[Krust @Kmart_layaway]

I need a life. I can tell my guinea pigs’ squeaks apart.

[Krust @Kmart_layaway]

When I get a dog I’m never going to speak English to it. I’m just gonna bark at it, because of how much of an empath I am.

[Krust @Kmart_layaway]

The fact that I tweeted this because I bled through my khakis because I couldn’t change my pad while we were in active lockdown because there was a shooting threat

[Krust @Kmart_layaway]

Always remember that khakis are never worth it no matter what

[Krust @Kmart_layaway]

I love my guinea pigs so much

[Krust @Kmart_layaway]

I’d just like to remind everyone that I got my Eras tour ticket for $79. I don’t brag often enough about it honestly.

[Krust @Kmart_layaway]

Someone just called me a “sanctimonious bitch” how do you even come back from that

[Krust @Kmart_layaway]

Being a grad student is literally embarrassing

[Krust @Kmart_layaway]

I will not allow a 2003 Honda Civic to bully me out of the left lane

[Krust @Kmart_layaway]

I bought a new car because my engine light came on in my old one and took like 5 tries to repair so I just didn’t trust it anymore. Engine light came on at 50 miles in my new car. Is it me? Is it the way I drive? Is it God?

[Krust @Kmart_layaway]

If Taylor Swift is the reason all of my social media fills with football stuff that will be last STRAW #IAMDONEWITHTAYLORSWIFT

[Krust @Kmart_layaway]

The oral surgeon said “it’s a boy” as he yanked out my wisdom tooth

[Krust @Kmart_layaway]

“If you were the loch ness monster everyone would know about it because you wouldn’t be able to shut up about it.”

[Krust @Kmart_layaway]

When I was younger I used to bring my yearbooks and class pictures downstairs and my mom and I would just make fun of everyone in them for like hours. Like not real make fun of them but like make up stories and lies about them in our own little world just for giggles.

[Krust @Kmart_layaway]

I had a nightmare that one of the surprise songs at my eras tour night was Taylor covering a song from Hamilton and I literally woke up mad

[Krust @Kmart_layaway]

The shame of being a woman calling the mechanic to say your engine light has been on for two weeks

[Krust @Kmart_layaway]

The game of hide and seek takes a lot of trust that someone cares enough to come find you.

[Krust @Kmart_layaway]

Today in a grad interview I literally said the words, “I know a lot of new englanders wouldn’t agree with me but I think Worcester has a lot of things going for it” and I deserve an oscar for that one

[Krust @Kmart_layaway]

This winter literally has me offroading in my jetta

[Krust @Kmart_layaway]

I’m not checking the washing instructions for anything. If the shirt can’t go in the normal wash cycle with the rest of my clothes then I am the wrong person to wear it.