Komodog Dragon

Mild mannered tweeter by day, hardcore sleeper by night

[Komodog Dragon @KomodogD]

WHOA HOLD UP SON THERE'S A FLY ON YOU
*Dad hits me with chair*
WAIT SON IT'S STILL THERE
*Climbs to top rope, elbow drop*
HANG ON SON IT'S S

[Komodog Dragon @KomodogD]

Can't believe they let people vote. People. What the fuck

[Komodog Dragon @KomodogD]

BBC documentary: in the mountains of Japan, thousands of people come together to form a waterfall of fire

Me: well then it's not a waterfall is it

[Komodog Dragon @KomodogD]

@SirEviscerate My dick is so big it's statistically above the national average if you don't filter for gender

[Komodog Dragon @KomodogD]

Hype man: EY WE READY LET'S DO THIS SHIT

Rapper: *launches into emphatic rendition of their biggest hit*

Hype man: I told him to do that

[Komodog Dragon @KomodogD]

I got I got I got back problems inside my DNA

[Komodog Dragon @KomodogD]

People. That's the problem isn't it

[Komodog Dragon @KomodogD]

@JamesPearceEcho You're ahead of my stream mate thanks a lot

[Komodog Dragon @KomodogD]

More like xbox dead

[Komodog Dragon @KomodogD]

Explain yourself @netflix

[Komodog Dragon @KomodogD]

Shoot for the moon. If you die, you die, wahey

[Komodog Dragon @KomodogD]

If you're reading this, ask yourself: why am I online

[Komodog Dragon @KomodogD]

*strides into Hollywood boardroom* one word, gentlemen - Pokemanimorphs

[Komodog Dragon @KomodogD]

I always put "Winston main" in the 'other - please specify' field of any section of any form

[Komodog Dragon @KomodogD]

God I wish I were a Russian sleeper agent

[Komodog Dragon @KomodogD]

What does one do when one has a strained chest muscle AND a tickling cough? Welcomes death, is the answer.

[Komodog Dragon @KomodogD]

What was I going to Google? It definitely mattered

[Komodog Dragon @KomodogD]

@hrtbps @George_Osborne He knows. That was the point. He's probably proud.

[Komodog Dragon @KomodogD]

@tokyo_sexwhale *chews straw* Yup. Welcome to the country, we've got heaps of shit.

[Komodog Dragon @KomodogD]

@tokyo_sexwhale Gotta be honest, if horseshit on a country lane surprises you then yeah, I'm afraid you do belong on the soft city nonce database. Norfolk looks lovely though I must say

[Komodog Dragon @KomodogD]

*weary, aged sigh* yeah