Kritika Vashist

Wordplay before foreplay.

[Kritika Vashist @Kritikally]

Applied sanitizer on my phone and my ex's photos got deleted.

[Kritika Vashist @Kritikally]

@MadOMarketing

[Kritika Vashist @Kritikally]

Me after getting my ideas rejected by the co worker I'm crushing hard on.
"Waise toh teri naa me bhi maine dhoondli apni khushi."

[Kritika Vashist @Kritikally]

Can't believe I just said fingering instead of figuring out in a meeting.

[Kritika Vashist @Kritikally]

Jab Zindagi aapke saath har roz mazak karti ho, toh aap ek din mazak karke kya hi kar loge.
#AprilFoolsDay2022

[Kritika Vashist @Kritikally]

Life's short. Thank God!

[Kritika Vashist @Kritikally]

Them: How come you are still single?
Me: Consistency is the key.

[Kritika Vashist @Kritikally]

This is just a phase bolte bolte aadhi life nikal gayi hai.

[Kritika Vashist @Kritikally]

@delhivery you guys should stop promoting ads where you show how you will send gifts to our loved ones on time coz clearly you don't care. My order has been stuck for days and no response. Such irresponsibility.
I should have ordered for next Christmas right?! @help_delhivery

[Kritika Vashist @Kritikally]

Dear Self  https://t.co/EZgnw9XyBi

[Kritika Vashist @Kritikally]

All these brands and respective agencies trying to be cool with #InstagramDown and #WhatsAppDown by tweeting one liners please understand how toxic it is of you and your team to ask copywriters to come up with something witty even late at night.

[Kritika Vashist @Kritikally]

Everything will workout except me. 🙅

[Kritika Vashist @Kritikally]

Life is always so unpredictable and fragile. Be kind. Don't be too hard on yourself. Don't miss the chances that you've today. Do what you believe in irrespective of anything. Nothing is certain, so just breathe and love more.

[Kritika Vashist @Kritikally]

Some people are so good with grammar, they should be given apostrophes.

#pun #punintended #original @MadOMarketing

[Kritika Vashist @Kritikally]

Shafeeq meri baat suno, baarish ko blame karne ka tumhara koi maqsad nahi, tum government ki incompetency, poor drainage aur sewage system ki bhi baat kar sakte the.

#DelhiRains #Monsoon #Delhi #Floods

[Kritika Vashist @Kritikally]

@ankitarathore02 I'll run away from this, literally (with you) 😂

[Kritika Vashist @Kritikally]

Look, we all have been going through a lot of shit due to the pandemic. What we can avoid is small talks that nobody is interested in. If you need a favor, just ask. Please don't sup me. We both know it only seems like an obligation. It's fine. We all are adults & understand.

[Kritika Vashist @Kritikally]

@VelentinaBrahma One word for you - Walk 💁😅

[Kritika Vashist @Kritikally]

(5/5)
There is a reason why most of the offices are located in Gurgaon because that place has got no life and it doesn't pay you well.

[Kritika Vashist @Kritikally]

#Gurgaon Rant - A Thread

(1/5)
If you tell me you're in Delhi then please don't ask me to come to Gurgaon to meet you.

[Kritika Vashist @Kritikally]

(4/5)
It is indeed expensive to live in Gurgaon because you need to have money to repair your car that drowns every year during monsoons.