Growth is usually painful to some degree. That’s because growth requires loss—a loss of your old values, your old behaviors, your old loves, your old identity.
Therefore, growth often has a component of grief to it.
Kobe Bryant once said:
“Everyone wants to be a beast. Everyone wants to be the best. But very few people are willing to do what it actually takes. Because what it takes is boring. It is waking up at 4:00 AM. It is shooting the same shot a thousand times. It is watching the film when you are tired. People fall in love with the result, but they hate the process. You have to fall in love with the boredom. You have to fall in love with the repetition.
If you can find joy in the mundane work that no one else sees, the lights will eventually shine on you.”
Be careful with the idea that ‘everyone is replaceable.’ Some people are truly one of a kind. If you lose them, life won’t hand you another version—you don’t meet certain souls twice.
Major cheat code in life: Understanding you can reinvent yourself at any time. New habits, new standards, new friend group, new career, etc. There's no rule that says you have to stay the person you've always been. You're allowed to decide, "I'm done being this version of me."
A mentor once told me: "One of the biggest reasons people stay stuck is that you can’t keep one foot in your old life and one in your new one. There’s no halfway version of growth. Decide who you want to be, and act like it. Every single damn day."
Major cheat code for life: Learn to delay your reaction. Anger, fear, and impulse will try to make you move fast. There's power in pausing. In the pause, you see clearly, you respond wisely, and you avoid decisions you’ll regret. Slow down to speed up.
A meal tastes different when eaten with gratitude. A walk feels different when taken with intention. A conversation deepens when truly heard. The magic isn't in what you do, but in how you do it.
What a privilege to be tired from work you once begged the universe for. what a privilege to feel overwhelmed by growth you used to dream about. what a privilege to be challenged by a life you created on purpose. What a privilege to outgrow things you used to settle for.
Trust in yourself is not only built through successful repetitions, but also through failed ones.
When you have worked through failures in the past, you fear them less in the future. You know you can bounce back.
Successful repetitions build competence. Failed repetitions build resilience.