Kyle Whitlock

[Kyle Whitlock @KyleWhitlock14]

💪

[G-Wiz @WizardsGWiz]

MOOD

[G-Wiz @WizardsGWiz]

MOOD

[SNY @SNYtv]

Juan Soto was asked what lessons he can take from the 2019 Washington Nationals, who started 19-31 and won the World Series

"I learned most of the things I know right now on that team"

As for the specifics?

"Those are my secrets. I can't share it"

[Nick Bateman @nickbateman33]

The Wizards haven’t won 50 games in a season since 1978-79

They haven’t played in a conference finals game since 1978-79 (longest drought in American sports)

They have exactly 50 wins in their last 250 games (3+ seasons)

They have the worst win % in the NBA from 2000-2026, 2010-2026 and 2020-2026

They were 1 lottery ball away from Zion, Wemby & Flagg

Gilbert Arenas pulled out a Glock in the locker room on Christmas Eve

Instead of signing Kevin Durant in 2016 they signed Ian Mahinmi

John Wall slipped in his bathtub and shattered his Achilles right after signing a $250 million supermax and never played another game with the team

They drafted Kwame Brown

They drafted Jan Vesely over Kawhi. Vesely retired with more fouls than points

They wanted Steph Curry but traded the 5th pick in 09 for Randy Foye instead

They officially have the worst record in the NBA again and if Adam Silver gives this team the 5th pick there will be legitimate riots in DC

[Kyle Whitlock @KyleWhitlock14]

Those Zards pick swaps are about to be even more valuable

[Shams Charania @ShamsCharania]

Reporting for NBA Today on a Board of Governors vote expected for May 28 to make anti-tanking rule changes:

[Charlie Slowes @CharlieSlowes]

THE SPIRIT OF OPENING DAY

Today you’ll dig in the closet for your glove and snap a ball into it while sipping your morning coffee.
Today you’ll drive to work and admonish yourself to “keep your head down” and your eye on the road.
Today your team will be in first and planning to stay there.
Today you’ll wonder about developing and selling tobacco-flavored toothpaste, as you spit into the sink.
Today you’ll still be able to turn the double play.
Today you’ll end your contract holdout.
Today you won’t lose a business deal in the sun.
Today you’ll find yourself rotating your arm around your head to stretch the shoulder and keep it loose.
Today sunflower seeds strangely find their way into your back pocket.
Today you’ll think of wearing a black suit to match the eye black.
Today you’ll have the steal sign.
Today you slip up in a meeting and mention “our sales team vs. lefties.”
Today as the toast comes out of the toaster, you’ll still remember how to execute a perfect “pop-up” slide.
Today a hot dog and peanuts for lunch will sound about right.
Today you tell a co-worker to “get loose.”
Today the only strike you’ll know about is above the knees and below the armpits.
Today you’ll wear your jacket only on your pitching arm.
Today you’ll buy two packs of gum and stuff them in the side of your mouth to look like a player.
Today, during lunch, you’ll wonder why Coke doesn’t come in a wood can.
Today you’ll scratch yourself and spit for no apparent reason.
Today you’ll wonder why stirrup socks never caught on as a fashion rage.
Today you’ll be the rookie looking to make it big.
Today you’ll be the wily vet with just a little something left.
Today you’ll look for the AM dial on your radio.
Today mom’s watching.
Today dad’s in the backyard with his glove.
Today will be hopeful.
Today it’ll still be a kids’ game.
Today you’ll be a kid.
Today is Opening Day.

[Domo @Domo8186]

Folks had no problem with the Wiz being ass all year but as soon as they add Trae & AD for free, MFers wanna be the police 😭😭😭😭😭😭

[SleeperWizards @SleeperWizards]

April 9, 2023: The box score from the Wizards season ending loss to the Rockets

The very last game Washington played before hiring Will Dawkins and Michael Winger to kickstart the rebuild in DC

Insane what can change in just 3 years 🤯

stats via @bball_ref

[Domo @Domo8186]

"[insert player] has the Washington Wizards as his top preferred trade destination"

Don't see that often man. It's a new day

[Daylen Lile Supporter @CommandersMuse]

Washington Wizards rooting guide for their 2026 draft picks.

1. Wizards lose as many games as possible to get the best odds on their pick (top 8 protected)

1B. Suns miss the playoffs and can potentially swap picks with Wizards if they get a better pick.

[Ben Standig @BenStandig]

The Chargers released QB Taylor Heinicke.

[👀 @CAL3BW1LL1AMS]

If we trade Poole who tf is gonna score any points😭😭😭

[Kyle Whitlock @KyleWhitlock14]

@SimplySans2 Can’t believe we ended up like this

[Kyle Whitlock @KyleWhitlock14]

@CJVelez3 @declan_friel23 You think present day @declan_friel23 s or prime 2018 over 300lb @declan_friel23 s?

[Will Clayton @DubClayton]

“Free Beal” in 2022: A lighthearted taunt from Suns fans who thought the Wizards were squandering Brad’s talent.

“Free Beal” in 2025: A bloodcurdling plea from Suns fans that are trapped under the tyranny of Brad & his NTC. The screams of agony are met with a chorus of laughter.

[Kyle Whitlock @KyleWhitlock14]

@declan_friel23 @SimplySans2 @KITKAT You never did nothing wrong so can you hit my guy up @MarsAustralia

[Kyle Whitlock @KyleWhitlock14]

@SimplySans2 How similar Oscars voters and Philly fans are

[Kyle Whitlock @KyleWhitlock14]

1st team all-snubbed

[Kyle Whitlock @KyleWhitlock14]

@SimplySans2 @pmagnerjr