Rachel 🇺🇦

✨c'est mon malheur que je cherche✨

[Rachel 🇺🇦 @L0rdcr0w]

Sometimes I read my own tweets and wonder if I'm ok on the inside.

[Rachel 🇺🇦 @L0rdcr0w]

My boyfriend: The math has shown that-
Me: Math is for wieners.
Bf: YOU'RE A WIENER

[Rachel 🇺🇦 @L0rdcr0w]

Thankfully I won't have to suffer the new Twitter logo on my phone, which is now so old that my service provider considers it obsolete, according to the physical letter they sent to inform me of this. Stubbornness really does pay off!

[John Green @sportswithjohn]

don't know about you but i am a little anxious.

[Rachel 🇺🇦 @L0rdcr0w]

Not sure where I thought I'd be at 23, but I can tell you I did not forsee myself getting whiskey drunk the night before my first date in two years, shoveling marshmallows into my mouth and trying not to shave my eyebrows off

[Rachel 🇺🇦 @L0rdcr0w]

@RAHagan_ Thanks! If shoes are a wild option, then I'm assuming wearing birkenstocks would be just pure insanity? 😂

[Rachel 🇺🇦 @L0rdcr0w]

So like, what do you wear to go golfing indoors on a date with your high school chemistry teacher's son? Because, while I am looking forward to it, the absurdity of this situation is not lost on me lol

[Rachel 🇺🇦 @L0rdcr0w]

So today I've decided to enter the world of sewing completely blind. I refuse to read instruction manuals or watch tutorials. I don't know what I'm doing and no one can stop me!

[Rachel 🇺🇦 @L0rdcr0w]

What the actor's name is:
Idris Elba

What my mom thinks his name is:
Interest Albums

[Rachel 🇺🇦 @L0rdcr0w]

I am NOT getting up at 6 in the morning to watch a king get coronated. Sorry Charles, I'm sure it'll be William's turn soon. -mom

[Rachel 🇺🇦 @L0rdcr0w]

I don't ask for a lot, but I do just wish I could eat my goglu in peace, please and thanks

[Rachel 🇺🇦 @L0rdcr0w]

Everything I do is iconic, Rachel. Every day. -mom

[Rachel 🇺🇦 @L0rdcr0w]

The Pope is such a cone head -mom

[Rachel 🇺🇦 @L0rdcr0w]

I love Brett Goldstein, unreservedly

[Rachel 🇺🇦 @L0rdcr0w]

@ahfuck12 WHAT?? 😂

[Rachel 🇺🇦 @L0rdcr0w]

What, you don't like my decorative bag of knives?

[Justin Trudeau @JustinTrudeau]

And with a disturbing rise in anti-transgender hate here in Canada and around the world recently, I want to be very clear about one more thing: Trans women are women. We will always stand up to this hate – whenever and wherever it occurs.

[Rachel 🇺🇦 @L0rdcr0w]

Forgive me, Italian ancestors, for eating pizza with a spoon

[kris meloche @krismeloche]

@PierrePoilievre The Tragically Hip hates you.

Lol...literally the band of a generation for ordinary Canadians.

[Rachel 🇺🇦 @L0rdcr0w]

I can't believe I had to tell my cat to stop trying to eat the door this morning. I really thought that not eating doors was kind of an unspoken rule, but cats love to surprise you sometimes