♛

[♛ @Lachidalgooo]

Kung hindi ikaw, 'wag na lang, Mahal.

[♛ @Lachidalgooo]

And there I realized, I WANTED TO BE LOVED WITH MY LOVE LANGUAGE.

[♛ @Lachidalgooo]

LOOKING FOR MAKI CONCERT TICKET FOR 2!!

Preffered po kahit balcony 😔

[♛ @Lachidalgooo]

Please, Lord, give us strength, especially him, to overcome this in our relationship 😔

[♛ @Lachidalgooo]

My man found a reason to live because of me. But here I am, losing the spark to continue life.

[KAYA NOVA @thekayanova]

Not to sound delusional or anything, but I want my 30s to be the healthiest chapter of my life.

[♛ @Lachidalgooo]

How choose my peace of mind over something.

And I wish I could give this personality to my boyfriend. He's having a hard time right now, and I don't know what help I could give or offer :<

[♛ @Lachidalgooo]

That heartache made me have this strong personality. Noon, I was scared to lose someone. I don't want to feel alone. But, when that event happened, I eventually learned how to be strong. How to think about myself first rather than thinking other people.

[♛ @Lachidalgooo]

I really hate people who doesn't have even a bit of self-awareness

[♛ @Lachidalgooo]

I hate it when I am suddenly triggered, kasi i can't think straight and you can see it on my face.

[♛ @Lachidalgooo]

And it happened again, when I saw his followings. You know what hurts the most? Kasi lahat ng nakita ko is opposite sa sex ko. I respect his identity and all. But, I need to respect myself too.

[♛ @Lachidalgooo]

and that micro-cheating thing sa showtime, that trigger me a lot.

[♛ @Lachidalgooo]

na that time, I was just hiding my own feelings, emotions. Ngayon, noong binalikan ko, ang sakit pala non. Gusto ko yakapin yung old self ko, kasi tangina, nasasaktan na pala ako nang hindi ko alam?

[♛ @Lachidalgooo]

We're good now. He's doing his best to change.

Pero, there are still times where I am questioning my worth. Questioning my decisions. Overthinking that he might doing it behind my back.

Sadly, this is what trauma do to humans. :>

[♛ @Lachidalgooo]

so, kung hindi ko ba makikita 'yon? o hindi ko siya i r-raise, he will talk to me the same as before?

[♛ @Lachidalgooo]

I still find it weird at the same time good thing.

Noon kasi, he would chat me in a cold/proper way. And wala naman akong problema roon actually. Pero noong nakita ko na sa iba he sounds energetic and all. Nakaramdam ako ng inggit. Hindi selos e, inggit.

[♛ @Lachidalgooo]

Kasi, kaya naman pala niya gawin sa iba 'yon? Pero sa akin hindi? He could be that sweet pala pero sa akin minsan lang kapag mataas energy?

And, good thing he changed the way he message me. Pero noong nakita ko lang iyon at noong nag labas ako ng saloobin ko.

[♛ @Lachidalgooo]

I don't really know the reason why I can't sleep last night, perhaps there's no reason. I was just scrolling with our photos, kinikilig. HUHUHU

[♛ @Lachidalgooo]

It's weird noh, I don't want to quit, but I feel like I'm dragging down my person with me.

[♛ @Lachidalgooo]

Ending, I will say sorry cuz it feels like I'm an added pebbles to his burdens.

[♛ @Lachidalgooo]

I don't know why I feel guilty after opening up my problem.