Lincoln

skinny jeans enthusiast, and i like things that start with the letter d..... dislikes: LACTOSE

[Lincoln @LactoseLincoln]

waiter brought sweet potato fries and my fiancé ate them for me because she knows i don't like them even though she doesn't either #soulmate

[Lincoln @LactoseLincoln]

Someone just tried to tell me Justin Beiber is from Canada... Um why are all his songs in English then? Nice try. #Belieber #nicetry

[Lincoln @LactoseLincoln]

I've post-pined my battle, apocalypse, demise...of "la leche"
#jointhewar

[Lincoln @LactoseLincoln]

Holy basketball!!! #Michigan #kansas

[Lincoln @LactoseLincoln]

One day ill stand against the tides of milk that roll against me, nay that roll against all those unfortunate lost lactose souls
#science

[Lincoln @LactoseLincoln]

Cuse baby!!!!!!!!!!!! #Strokecity

[Lincoln @LactoseLincoln]

Pop bottles get models
#ATH4lyfe

[Lincoln @LactoseLincoln]

The downside to being a band wagon fan is that it makes buying jerseys and memorabilia really hard.
#firstworldproblems

[Lincoln @LactoseLincoln]

I've gone 30 mins without a snapchat of someone pooping
#pleasehelp
#nodiarrhea

[Lincoln @LactoseLincoln]

I don't have wet wipes at work...
#lactosepoopsaretheworst

[Lincoln @LactoseLincoln]

Stranger: what kind of bees make the best milk
Me: I'm lactose intolerant
Stranger: boo-bees!! Get it!
Me: get the hell out of my house

[Lincoln @LactoseLincoln]

What did the doctor say to the midget?!
-you'll just have to be a little patient!!!
#lactoselegend #MOP

[Lincoln @LactoseLincoln]

Gargled some milk last night but didn't swallow...just wanted to get that rush
#imabadass #dangerzone #notscaredofmilk

[Lincoln @LactoseLincoln]

If Rex Ryan ever becomes an announcer I swear I will do whatever I can to end the NFL
#nofatties

[Lincoln @LactoseLincoln]

Some nights I lay awake wondering what my life would be like if I could drink milk like a normal person...
#mcpoylswedding

[Lincoln @LactoseLincoln]

Whenever I hear someone mention Chino California, a place I've never been, my instinct is to say "chino, ew!" #OCproblems #summerwind

[Lincoln @LactoseLincoln]

Thank god I'm intolerant to lactose and not gummy bears!
#savinggrace #gummybearBJ's

[Go to Bluesky to save your brain -- L O L G O P @LOLGOP]

“If this works out,” the PBS statement concludes, “next season we’ll meet Big Oil’s imaginary friend, ‘Clean Coal.’” http://t.co/ydKWn7hH

[Lincoln @LactoseLincoln]

So pumped my best friend Ben is coming to visit this weekend!!!
#bestweekendever