Landon Gehman

Pretty much just have Twitter to quote my friends

[Landon Gehman @LandonGehman]

"The Lord giveth and the GLP-1's taketh away." -J.A.

[Landon Gehman @LandonGehman]

"I want to raise an animal from infancy to food." -C.S.

[Landon Gehman @LandonGehman]

"I need the TSA to match my freak before I can get through" -C.S.

[Landon Gehman @LandonGehman]

"We Live" by Superchick comes on

Dax: I won a talent show singing this song once

Nate: I was in a similar situation once but with "I Can Only Imagine" by MercyMe

[Landon Gehman @LandonGehman]

I am selling 2, 4 day General Admission passes for @BourbonNBeyond
DM for the Lyte link
#BourbonAndBeyond #BourbonNBeyond

[XBOX @XBOX]

Make his finest asset yours

Follow & Repost with #XboxCheekyControllerSweepstakes for a chance to win a custom Xbox Series X console & 2 Cheeky Controllers designed by Deadpool.‌

Ages 18+. Ends 8/11/24. Rules: https://t.co/MI0oKWl1Xf

@Marvel Studios' Deadpool and Wolverine, in theaters July 26

[Landon Gehman @LandonGehman]

"On our 90 days without an injury we got a 90 dollar gift certificate. But the next week a guy crashed a truck outside and we got a lawsuit" -M.G.

[Landon Gehman @LandonGehman]

"If your absence doesn't bother them, then your presence never mattered to them in the first place." -D.S.

[Landon Gehman @LandonGehman]

B.G.: "Somebody's walking their horse."

Me: "Walki... you mean riding?"

[Landon Gehman @LandonGehman]

"I could be pregnant again. Like I would carry the baby. I just..... wouldn't want to keep it." - A.Y.

[Landon Gehman @LandonGehman]

"I check fire stations all the time. There are never any babies." -M.G.

[Landon Gehman @LandonGehman]

"I'm jealous of your ability to sleep quickly and.... just about anywhere." -BG

[Landon Gehman @LandonGehman]

"People should not be driving. Like, if you're old or a woman, get out!" -Bri

[Landon Gehman @LandonGehman]

"If I ever get fired, it's definitely going to be for violence. I can tell." - Anon

[Landon Gehman @LandonGehman]

"That's my girl. She can hold her drugs." *high five* - Anon

[Landon Gehman @LandonGehman]

"One time I told Starbucks I needed a pup cup for my dead mother's dog because I wanted whipped cream" - S.W.

[Landon Gehman @LandonGehman]

Cousin: Can I use pine-sol on myself?

Me: What's in it?

Cousin: I don't know, but it kills 99% of whatever. I don't have soap here yet. So, this will have to do.

[Landon Gehman @LandonGehman]

"Landon, it was very nice to meet you, but I am now a chicken." -K.W.

[Landon Gehman @LandonGehman]

"If she poops herself back into Afib, I'm gonna cry." -KW

[Landon Gehman @LandonGehman]

"I accidentally got happy when I saw your face, and I had to get myself mad again." -BT