Laura Stillwagon

Taking life one step at a time, like a carpenter, building stairs!

[Laura Stillwagon @LauraRenee96]

I saw no post from my mother yesterday on national daughter day. Notes have been taken.

[Laura Stillwagon @LauraRenee96]

Ok we are not about to sit here and rename fanny packs “belt bags”. Let’s not reinvent the wheel. Please don’t disgrace the 90s like that.

[Laura Stillwagon @LauraRenee96]

It’s 7 pm and the sun has not fully set 😭😭😭🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻

[Laura Stillwagon @LauraRenee96]

Slowly realizing that a big part of motherhood is dropping your food on your baby and then eating it off of them while they nurse. Today I ate spaghetti off of my daughter’s head.

[Laura Stillwagon @LauraRenee96]

@SarhaSays So I may not be the best spokesperson for tracking your cycle as a form of birth control considering I have an unplanned child right now BUT it does actually work, and it’s pretty easy, you just have to stick to it 😂

[Laura Stillwagon @LauraRenee96]

70,000 people and celebrities attended the super bowl unmasked, no social distancing, but my husband had to sit in the car during our daughter’s 1 week pediatrician appt because of a one parent Covid safety rule. Ok.

[Laura Stillwagon @LauraRenee96]

Never did I think I would be pregnant at the same time as Rihanna. What an honor!

[Laura Stillwagon @LauraRenee96]

Are you telling me I worked 4 years for a college degree when I could have just been selling farts in a jar all along?????

[Metro @MetroUK]

This truly is a story like no other...

Stephanie Matto, a former 90 Day Fiance star who made £38,000 a week from selling her farts in a jar (yes, really) has revealed that she was rushed to hospital...

@aliciaadejobi reports:
🧵👇
https://t.co/12KH2ZtAgU

[Laura Stillwagon @LauraRenee96]

Started off our first week living in New Mexico by getting to see @DaveCoulier from Full House perform at Cannon AFB! Wooooo

[Laura Stillwagon @LauraRenee96]

When it’s going to rain all day, you don’t have to work, and have nowhere you need to be: NO BONES DAY!!!! 🙌🏻

[Laura Stillwagon @LauraRenee96]

Sometimes I stop and think about how I’m going to be somebody’s mother in a few months. Lol ummmmm

[Laura Stillwagon @LauraRenee96]

Imagine @mykaylaskinner thinking her Olympics were over and that she was officially a retired gymnast and then 5 days later ends up winning a silver medal! #amazing

[Laura Stillwagon @LauraRenee96]

How am I supposed to work when the US women’s gymnastics team is .8 going into the final rotation while Simone is OUT. I cannot handle this.

[Laura Stillwagon @LauraRenee96]

Me with absolutely 0 gymnastics ability watching the women’s gymnastics Olympic trials anytime they do 70 flips off a 6 in beam and don’t stick the landing:

[Laura Stillwagon @LauraRenee96]

We have to stop with the 15 different international dance days per year. One. Let’s pick one day.

[Laura Stillwagon @LauraRenee96]

Remember that one earth day where Dean had a tree planting ceremony and Dr. Rooney said all these things about how great she thought trees were or whatever, and then right behind the ceremony they were chopping down all the trees along Main Street? Fantastic stuff

[Laura Stillwagon @LauraRenee96]

Excuse me?

[Variety @Variety]

‘Bridgerton’ Breakout Regé-Jean Page Will Not Appear in Season 2 https://t.co/1C3SnP6gyh

[Laura Stillwagon @LauraRenee96]

Dead 😂😂😂

[Laura Stillwagon @LauraRenee96]

I can’t even begin to tell you how normal it is for me to pack a salad and forget a fork so I eat it with my hands while driving. Just fistfuls of spinach. Idk. The sanitizer on my hands adds flavor too. Kinda almost feels like a salad dressing.

[John Krasinski @johnkrasinski]

They always say good things come to those who wait. Well... I think we’ve waited long enough.
A QUIET PLACE PART II
MEMORIAL DAY