Layton Matthews

I have a psychotic pet Armadillo named McConadilla

[Layton Matthews @LaytonMatthews]

Everytime you take a memory out, you change it.

[Layton Matthews @LaytonMatthews]

Just saw @VengeanceFilm and @bjnovak killed it! As a small-town Texan dating a big city girl we both laughed nonstop at the excellent portrayal of Texas and its culture shocks to outsiders. Poetic and profound as well as hilarious, its a much watch.

[Layton Matthews @LaytonMatthews]

Queen Elizabeth II has reigned for 30% of US History 😳 #QueenElizabeth

[Layton Matthews @LaytonMatthews]

So does #SquidGame being the biggest show on #netflix make us the VIP’s? 🤔

[Layton Matthews @LaytonMatthews]

Doesn’t the fact that quantum particle states are determined when they are observed sound suspiciously similar to how video games only render what you’re facing and able to see? Simulation confirmed? #simulation #cern #uncertainty #Physics #quantum #partical

[Layton Matthews @LaytonMatthews]

The #tiktak the #navy keeps seeing is really that thing from #theabyss right @JimCameron ? #ufotwitter #uaf #ufo #aliendrone

[Layton Matthews @LaytonMatthews]

There’s 8B people on the planet right now and there’s only ever been 100B 🤯 #mindblown #FlatEarth #whyisflatearthahashtag? 😝

[Layton Matthews @LaytonMatthews]

Yo cyber attack dudes, how bout these student loans huh? #cyberattack #hackers #zerocool

[Layton Matthews @LaytonMatthews]

True story 😝 https://t.co/91ZlLxKjAu

[Layton Matthews @LaytonMatthews]

@theEvanGamble Texas has entered the chat...

[Layton Matthews @LaytonMatthews]

When are they gonna #deepfake #JohnTravolta and #NicolasCage in #faceoff so it makes more sense?

[Layton Matthews @LaytonMatthews]

Im bout to straight CRUSH some bottomless mimosas bro. (Said the guy with the manbun)

[Layton Matthews @LaytonMatthews]

😂

[Ross Miller 🍿🎬 @rosstmiller]

Is it possible to die from cringeing at a video? Because I think I just did

[Layton Matthews @LaytonMatthews]

Ahoy, Me Hearties! Is this @SashaBaronCohen in this random one-liner role from a 90s pirate documentary???

[Layton Matthews @LaytonMatthews]

Just saw a subtitle mistype say ‘Space Sex’. Nice. #SpaceLaunchLIVE #SpaceX

[Layton Matthews @LaytonMatthews]

I must be getting lonely. I saw a video of the mars rover beeping happy birthday to itself, the only thing on an entire planet and I started to tear up. A rover 😳🤦‍♂️ #anthropomorphizing

[Layton Matthews @LaytonMatthews]

When they tell me I’m doing my part by ordering delivery.

[Layton Matthews @LaytonMatthews]

I have the heater going AND all the windows open. Just cause I want to hear the rainstorm outside. #QuarantineLife

[Layton Matthews @LaytonMatthews]

The worst thing about being of the one generation that straddles the change from a 1000 years of an analogue civilization to the next 1000 years as a digital civilization, is that the shot by shot remake of Reservoir Dogs (with zombies) I made on 8mm as a kid will never be seen.

[Layton Matthews @LaytonMatthews]

I'm such a sucker for ’Socially acward PhD in subject X summoned to the pentagon to save the world with his whacky and now super relevent knowledge'. Gonna be a Stargate, Core, and Sphere day. It’s all Michael Crichton’s fault.