Legally Brunette 🌹

Lover of heels, black beans, pineapple, mason jars, hockey, and everything pink & sparkly. I tweet politics and sex. And also cat videos #lawtwitter she/her

[Legally Brunette 🌹 @LegalHorrorStor]

Trump is gonna lose control of his pen and sign shit that deports his wife.
At least she'll be freed.

[Legally Brunette 🌹 @LegalHorrorStor]

@420AttyChicago Crock pot.

[Legally Brunette 🌹 @LegalHorrorStor]

Okay here’s my seasonal update: I just cheersed to the Oxford comma and thought of y’all… here ya go… okay see ya

[kelbin @pissboymcgee]

did some people just think Palestine had to like file paperwork or something to be freed. this is what oppressed fighting the oppressor looks like

[Legally Brunette 🌹 @LegalHorrorStor]

@nienna121 I read this tweet and legit sang that name to the same tune of that song so I guess they have a point.

[Calm like a 💣 @calmlikeab]

@IncognitoMeems @FBIBoston The “party of law & order” folks are big mad at the enforcement of law and order

[Legally Brunette 🌹 @LegalHorrorStor]

Finally not locked out of my account… what have you rascals been up to

[Legally Brunette 🌹 @LegalHorrorStor]

Elongated Muskrat is no longer the worlds richest person. Good.

[Legally Brunette 🌹 @LegalHorrorStor]

@AKBrews Why is this not a resounding yes??

[Legally Brunette 🌹 @LegalHorrorStor]

@Bokeh_Badger 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼

[Legally Brunette 🌹 @LegalHorrorStor]

Things I didn’t ever expect or plan at all to do: wear a blazer to a burlesque show.
C’est la Legas, on a Monday

[Legally Brunette 🌹 @LegalHorrorStor]

Also I just want to say I have 4 - YES FOUR - new subscribers to my onlyfans.

[Legally Brunette 🌹 @LegalHorrorStor]

I’ve been in Las Vegas for 4 hours and this bitch is already tryna start something. Girl, you’re lucky you didn’t meet me in Boston.

[Legally Brunette 🌹 @LegalHorrorStor]

Overheard a conversation between two gay men at the bar, “yeah, he cheated on me and broke my heart, but at least I don’t have to go to church again.”

[Legally Brunette 🌹 @LegalHorrorStor]

Coming back on to tell y’all I’m in DC for the week. Carry on

[Legally Brunette 🌹 @LegalHorrorStor]

If you think that the Supreme Court overturning Roe v. Wade is just giving the rights back to the states, I’m only left to assume that you copied every single homework assignment in high school. Or, you didn’t start being interested in politics until the age of 47. Maybe both.

[croptopsandcourtrooms @croptopsllc]

Prosecutors are just cops that peaked in law school instead of high school.

[Legally Brunette 🌹 @LegalHorrorStor]

Can I still call myself Legally Brunette if I’m (mostly) blonde?

[Jack Cocchiarella 🌹 @JDCocchiarella]

If separation of church and state has ended, the church’s tax-exempt status should too.

[Legally Brunette 🌹 @LegalHorrorStor]

“Pro life” but this country has the highest mortality rate for women in childbirth of all first world countries?

[ken. @kenkhristine]

“pro life” but no baby formula on the shelves? yeah okay.

[ScottyJohns @highroadsaloon]

I said to my wife "Do you think anyone will commit suicide because they could not get an abortion?"
She instantly replied "yes."
Then she added "there will be all those boyfriends and husbands that murder them because they couldn't get one too" and that shook my fucking world.