Leonardo DiCATprio

I don’t think I’m better than a dog. I know it.

[Leonardo DiCATprio @Leon_DiCATprio]

My name is Leonardo, but you may call me Mr. DiCatprio.

[Leonardo DiCATprio @Leon_DiCATprio]

Just a quick reminder that I am still a cat, and I am still blocked by @MattBevin

[Leonardo DiCATprio @Leon_DiCATprio]

Sink water just hits different.

[John Ashcraft @johnashcraft]

My kid thinks she’s funny. She’s right. @AshcraftEmma https://t.co/PxRtDYjTxo

[Leonardo DiCATprio @Leon_DiCATprio]

I am worried that the male human is losing it. He keeps saying things like “c’mon cats” and “go cats”. He knows that I am the only cat in the house. Maybe he doesn’t understand plural nouns. #poorhuman #BBN #GoCats

[Leonardo DiCATprio @Leon_DiCATprio]

Happy birthday, @AshcraftEmma! I will never forgive you for trying to return me to the shelter.

[Leonardo DiCATprio @Leon_DiCATprio]

I speak to the humans and they always respond with their gibberish. The poor fools try. Bless their hearts.

[Leonardo DiCATprio @Leon_DiCATprio]

Intensity is vital in all things. That is even true of napping. Check out my instructional video on intense napping.

[Leonardo DiCATprio @Leon_DiCATprio]

@dominonotpizza Well played, comrade!

[Leonardo DiCATprio @Leon_DiCATprio]

Yesterday was #NationalCatDay. The human did nothing for me. Not one present. Not one tweet. Nothing. If I puke in his bed, he can’t say he didn’t have it coming.

[Leonardo DiCATprio @Leon_DiCATprio]

The humans left me at home to fend for myself and take care of my own needs so they could spend a weekend at the lake. So, I prayed for rain to ruin their Saturday and let them know how it feels to not have their needs met. #RainForTheWin #ThatWillTeachThem

[Leonardo DiCATprio @Leon_DiCATprio]

This #SocialDistancing stuff is exhausting. The humans are always in my space and interrupting 18 of my 24 daily naps.

[Leonardo DiCATprio @Leon_DiCATprio]

@GovAndyBeshear I practice #SocialDistancing as a rule. Here’s a pro-tip: the tub is a great place to get away from the world and relax. #TeamKentucky #TogetherKy #Patriot

[Leonardo DiCATprio @Leon_DiCATprio]

@nicksonr_ Shall I send you my Venmo?

[Leonardo DiCATprio @Leon_DiCATprio]

Just found out that I got blocked by @Mattbevin . Greatest day of my short cat life. Let it be known that I am now the top political cat in Kentucky. #PolitiCat #BlockedByBevin #FeatherInMyCap #ProudMoment

[Leonardo DiCATprio @Leon_DiCATprio]

The male human is packing his bag again. Perhaps this time he will see the value of taking a travel companion. I’ll wait.

[Leonardo DiCATprio @Leon_DiCATprio]

The human sent me this picture from his travels. I assume to remind me of how miserable he is and how much he would rather be at home attending to my needs. I know how he hates the beach.

[Leonardo DiCATprio @Leon_DiCATprio]

#NewProfilePic

[Leonardo DiCATprio @Leon_DiCATprio]

During this holiday season I would like to remind everyone that it is not just an appropriate time to get me gifts (like every other day of the year); it is now a requirement. And no gift cards! Put some thought into me. #ChristmasCat #GiveMeThings

[Leonardo DiCATprio @Leon_DiCATprio]

The adult male said he was going to take a “cat nap” this afternoon. I was excited about the prospect of borrowing his warmth for an extended period, but he only slept for an hour. I don’t think he understands that a true cat’s nap is approximately 18 hours. #disappointed