Lisa K 🖖

Dreaming of a Caledonian retirement ⚜ Sweary little f*cker! ⚜ A lot older than you are, kiddo.⚜ Played by Jeffrey Combs.

[Lisa K 🖖 @LifeOnSkaro]

"Pick out any album The Lemonheads have ever released. Randomly skip to any track you want. That track is awesome." - John Cheese #Truth

[Lisa K 🖖 @LifeOnSkaro]

Meanwhile, we're all supposed to do what exactly? Wait it out for the next few hours hoping they'll stop? Because asking them to turn it down just resulted in them turning it up.

[Lisa K 🖖 @LifeOnSkaro]

Police will tell you they can do fuck all about the little shits with the massive speaker that is making the floors vibrate in every room of your house until 11pm. Fob you off to the council who say there's limited resources and it's not looking great.

[Lisa K 🖖 @LifeOnSkaro]

Why does Naked Attraction suddenly have emojis over everyone's knackers? 🤣 #Channel4

[Lisa K 🖖 @LifeOnSkaro]

Pharmacy gave an Easyhaler. Which I can't fucking use. Tenner down the drain and wheezing like a motherfucker. Why couldn't they just give me a normal one?

[Lisa K 🖖 @LifeOnSkaro]

I could watch a whole Sunday omnibus of just drunk Kathy. #EastEnders

[Lisa K 🖖 @LifeOnSkaro]

Promised myself an early night. Yet here I am at 1:41am, stull wide awake and listening to Sisters of Mercy. Not like I have to be up for work is it, oh stupid brain of mine? 😑

[Lisa K 🖖 @LifeOnSkaro]

I can't be the only one who hears "Samanade" on that Sam & Ade Go Birding advert? Like, as if it's some new salmon flavoured fizzy drink? 🤣 🍹

[Lisa K 🖖 @LifeOnSkaro]

I hope that the nephew appreciates just how hard it is for me to buy him a Slipknot t-shirt for his birthday and not keep it for myself. 😬

[Lisa K 🖖 @LifeOnSkaro]

Of all the adverts that seem so keen on using my name, the Numan wegiht loss one is the absolute worst. Doesn't help that Buffet Boy reminds me of an ex. Ultimate nightmare fuel.

[Lisa K 🖖 @LifeOnSkaro]

@Liza137823 Wish him luck in his future endeavours.

[Lisa K 🖖 @LifeOnSkaro]

The only thing worse than targeted ads for your company on your week off is when it refuses to disappear when you tap the little 'x' in the corner. Begone, foul swine!

[Lisa K 🖖 @LifeOnSkaro]

@TheMekon_Venus Tommy Cooper

[Lisa K 🖖 @LifeOnSkaro]

Sometimes my opinion on a person comes down to their answer to one simple question: Steve or Jefferson?

[Lisa K 🖖 @LifeOnSkaro]

Bit weird that there's an Evri locker at the garage within a stone's throw of my house yet it doesn’t show up as an option as being closest to my postcode. I mean, it even has the same postcode. 😆

[Lisa K 🖖 @LifeOnSkaro]

@AmazonHelp For some reason I can't seem to DM you. 😶 will keep an eye open for that packaging option though.

[Lisa K 🖖 @LifeOnSkaro]

@AmazonHelp Is there a particular reason you've started just slapping address labels on clear plastic so everyone can see what's being delivered? Bad enough the delivery instructions not to leave packages are being completely ignored. Surprised it was still there when I got home.

[Lisa K 🖖 @LifeOnSkaro]

@oelma__ Ready Salted

[Lisa K 🖖 @LifeOnSkaro]

Doesn't half mess with your mind when the Ninja advert comes on as you're air frying food. Was that beep on the telly or in the kitchen? 😫🤣

[Lisa K 🖖 @LifeOnSkaro]

@Marlayna29 In the UK (or at least my part of the UK) we just called it registration.

[Lisa K 🖖 @LifeOnSkaro]

People don't think I'm serious when I talk about how tiny my bathroom is. Even the Borrowers would feel a bit cramped in that thing 😆