Bitchy Lifeguard

Just 4,000+ bonding in minimum wage torture. Avi: @julie_miller9 Header: @bubblykenken owner: @mariahcatherine co-owner: @pineappleabuelo and @maddomania

[Bitchy Lifeguard @LifeguardBitchy]

Some of you have never had a middle-aged White woman yell at you for her child failing a swim test, despite the fact he can’t swim... and it really shows.

[Bitchy Lifeguard @LifeguardBitchy]

Do what you want with this information.

[Bitchy Lifeguard @LifeguardBitchy]

@kevemery Personally, I’ve been guarding in sneakers and socks my whole life guarding career. I just jump in with them still on, doesn’t affect my ability to make the save

[Bitchy Lifeguard @LifeguardBitchy]

Running a poll so that I can argue with my supervisors. Sweats while guarding?

[Bitchy Lifeguard @LifeguardBitchy]

Also shoes and leggings, but one issue at a time

[Bitchy Lifeguard @LifeguardBitchy]

Pool gotta be open this summer for no other reason than this game. I’m about to drown my coworkers.

[ESPN @espn]

Underwater Torpedo League was developed by Marine Raiders to help them remain calm underwater.

It looks WILD. 😳

(via @UTL_Nation)

[Bitchy Lifeguard @LifeguardBitchy]

Excuse me, $20/hr?? I’ve worked my way up to supervisor at my establishment and still only make a buck or two over minimum.

[Bitchy Lifeguard @LifeguardBitchy]

@belle_nic Same, I just make a lot more during the summer

[Bitchy Lifeguard @LifeguardBitchy]

Alright my summer guards, who else worried about their summer income not being open?😳

[Bitchy Lifeguard @LifeguardBitchy]

I said, “whoever dead man floats.. your mom’s a hoe.” 🤷🏻‍♀️

[Bitchy Lifeguard @LifeguardBitchy]

Lifeguard class: $250
Wage after tax: $5.50/ hour
Weekly Hours: 20

You work for 2.5 weeks before you even see a penny of earned income.

[Bitchy Lifeguard @LifeguardBitchy]

It truly blows my mind how I have years of experience, have taken hundreds of hours of classes, am LITERALLY trained to save someone’s life, and I can barely get a place to pay me over $10/ hour.

[Joshua Arnoldy @JoshuaArnoldy]

Me in a future interview:

“Being a lifeguard prepared me for the real world because my bosses didn’t have the same certification or training I did and still thought they knew how to do my job better.“

@lifeguardLife3 @hlifeguard @LifeguardBitchy

[Bitchy Lifeguard @LifeguardBitchy]

Hey @twoshotgurl , DM me your Venmo name and I’ll send over a little sumsum. 🤠😎🤙🏼

[Bitchy Lifeguard @LifeguardBitchy]

Hey everyone! Go like and comment on this photo to help us win a free bar tab... as lifeguards, we need booze!

Comment a “🤠” on the photo and retweet this and I’ll choose someone to Venmo beer money to!

[Bitchy Lifeguard @LifeguardBitchy]

Hey everyone! Go like and comment on this photo to help us win a free bar tab... as lifeguards, we need booze!

Comment a “🤠” on the photo and retweet this and I’ll choose someone to Venmo beer money to!

[Urban Cowboy @_urbancowboy__]

If I ever die and some dick head I didn’t fuck with starts posting how much they love and miss me. Beat their ass

[Bitchy Lifeguard @LifeguardBitchy]

What’s the worst, most fireable, thing you ever did at your job?

Here’s mine: I worked with my best friend and we made a bet on who would have sex in our boss’ office first. She won. But I got redemption. 🤤����

[Bitchy Lifeguard @LifeguardBitchy]

Nobody:

Baby Boomer: “Are you even certified?”

[Bitchy Lifeguard @LifeguardBitchy]

@_CharlesPreston 8.

[Bitchy Lifeguard @LifeguardBitchy]

Some of you have never had a middle-aged White woman yell at you for her child failing a swim test, despite the fact he can’t swim... and it really shows.

[Bitchy Lifeguard @LifeguardBitchy]

No one:

Lifeguard: