Mitch

Congrats. You've reached the bottom of Twitter. Views (looking up) are my own.

[Mitch @Lifeisamitch]

RFK JR (snakes in hand): My approach to diabetes is working!

https://t.co/gzjLvVmysB

[Mitch @Lifeisamitch]

@horrormuseum It just keeps getting better with every scene

[Mitch @Lifeisamitch]

MACRON: I need to show a sign of strength-

ASSISTANT: Put these on, like Tom Cruise in Top Gun

MACRON: Ah, oui, *puts shades on* What do you think?

ASSISTANT: Maverick or Macron, I can't tell the difference

MACRON: We're in the Danger Zone, baby

*can't see stage, gets help*

[Mitch @Lifeisamitch]

@Matt_Pinner Jolly Jitsu

[Mitch @Lifeisamitch]

@Matt_Pinner he died twice

[Mitch @Lifeisamitch]

@CrackerBarrel A cop hugs a woke protestor. Russia and Ukraine drop their weapons. Congress stops arguing, rejoices. Glaciers freeze, a tree grows, peace in the Middle East. Biscuits rise. Eggs sizzle. 12 elderly eaters step off a Pace bus to enjoy breakfast again. Flags flying full staff.

[Mitch @Lifeisamitch]

@TheFigen_ Live action Far Side.

[Mitch @Lifeisamitch]

@SteaknShake Damn, kickin’ a competitor while they’re down, when did you become Wendy’s?

[Mitch @Lifeisamitch]

@AMAZlNGNATURE Finding Nemo 3. December 2025.

[Mitch @Lifeisamitch]

@curiosityonx Olive Garden

[Mitch @Lifeisamitch]

F--K! This changes EVERYTHING!

https://t.co/KVadT3LamJ

[Mitch @Lifeisamitch]

@washingtonpost No pressure. Play ball!😨

[Mitch @Lifeisamitch]

@PopCrave "Hey step, you're FIRED!"

[Mitch @Lifeisamitch]

@consequence Sounds like somebody's gonna need a new REAL ID. Get in line Ye Ye.

[Mitch @Lifeisamitch]

Their first assignment: make him likable.

[Mitch @Lifeisamitch]

@netflix @mulaney John looks like your servers right now. #FixTheFlix

[Mitch @Lifeisamitch]

@netflix @thekiaforum More like TU-DOWN 😔

[Mitch @Lifeisamitch]

Remember the good ol’ days when planes could fly?

[Mitch @Lifeisamitch]

@Sling Half Time show video lagged. Do better.

[Mitch @Lifeisamitch]

@maxhelp Did those steps. Think your ad breaks cause hiccups and freezes that sometimes need total reboots.