Nditsheni 😎

Twitterspaces addict🙈

[MAKANAKI @black_bhoy_]

Why now 😂😂

[seapei kaofela 🇿🇦 @Silindokuhle_]

4plate ya 2plate… I’m sure e wisa motlakase gore 😭

[MaMhlanga Nompumelelo @Mpumiln]

@SizweDhlomo @misumuzi_4 Bewayo bounce awethu, ku Vibrate the whole filling station 😭😭🤣

[Victoria Olamide👸😍❤️ @VikyInsights]

Most modern women will follow this path:

-Be a total wh@re in her 20s. get tattoos, travel and party.
-At 29, become very religious, meet a rich simp that ignores her past, make him wait for sex, marry him
-By 35 have his 3 kids out of the way.
-At 38, get bored of him. take half his properties. The house. And the kids. and be a total whore again.
-By 40. become a life coach. and teach other women how to live life. 💔🙊

[This Account Makes You Happy @FeelYouHappy]

Education will never teach this 🥰

[Lawrence Kitema @lawrencekitema]

You don't have to be everyone's butterfly. Be a bee. Mind your business, make your honey, and sting people when necessary.

[Rene🧚🫧 @sheisafairyyy]

Employment might come with its own frustrations, but unemployment has a way of breaking an adult’s confidence to the point where even answering calls, socializing and living life feels heavy 💔💔

[Dear Self. @Dearme2_]

Adulting is realizing;

1. You will die, and most people won’t care after a while.
2. People use you until you’re no longer useful.
3. Most people secretly want you to fail.
4. One day you’ll wish you started today.
5. Most people fake happiness while dying inside.
6. No one is coming to save you.
7. You’ll be judged no matter what you do.
8. Your health is your greatest wealth.
9. Happiness is temporary—discipline is permanent.
10. Success takes longer than you think.
11. No one respects weakness, even if they sympathize.
12. Complaining changes nothing.
13. Not everyone you love will love you back.
14. Money won’t solve all your problems—but it solves most.
15. Social media lies to you every day.
16. You’re replaceable at your job.
17. Life is unfair—get used to it.
18. One day, you’ll run out of days.
19. Regret hurts more than failure.
20. Nobody cares about your excuses. Work harder

The earlier you understand this, the better and easier your life gets.

[GOD GULUVA @Zweli_Thixo]

Never date those ladies who claim to be introverts. Dated one that was so quiet and very shy too, I also wondered ngizoyenzani le tortoise.

When she visited me for the first time, wafika wahlala kwi corner yeBed. It was so quiet in the room so I had to enforce a conversation.

While I was talking I made her smile and she got too shy, she decided to hide her head under the bed. Kuvele imilenze, I had to use leyo milenze to pull her out.

Aike! abuyele on her corner of the bed. Ngithi let me kiss her and see what’s gonna happen. Ngamshaya ngale kiss yaku Generations the legacy, she kissed me back then pushed me and said she’s not ready.

Okay ngiphakama ngimyeka, angibambe emqaleni angiphose ebondeni and kiss me kwindlebe athi “Grrrrr! Ngizokulimaza”. Avele abenamahloni futhi ayofaka ikhanda ngaphansi kweBed. Pull her out again ngemilenze, aphume. Athi “Inkinga Zwe angikho ready cause uzongi judger”. I had to explain to her that babe, this is a safe space. Just be you. Ngithi ngisakhuluma aphinde futhi angibambe emqaleni angiphose ebondeni, and say, “Shhhh! Mommy is gonna take care of you” she started to finger my noise and said she feels like satan maka fryer abantu emlilweni.

She took off my clothes and also took her clothes off. Yey!! izinto angenza zona. There's this other woman on top ngathi you are being electrocuted by Eskom. That time umane anginike iLook and say, “Who’s your mommy?”. Ngibuze ukuthi uMama ungenaphi kulento? She increased her speed when I try to talk angifake ibele emlomeni.

Ngizwe ngathi I will faint. Alikhiphe ibele abuze again, “Who’s your mommy?”. Ngithi ngu Sis Martha babe. Athi “Msunu ka Sis Marth, ngim unyoko”. Yey! I don't know how many times I apologized. When I was about to cum I told her and she said, “Le yiPre-school, ishoda ngabanantwana”. Ahy vele I couldn't hold in anymore ngivele ngikhulule. When I was done waphakama wayongena ngekhandi ngaphansi kweBed again. Now my only wish was that angaphumi.

Wavuka ebsuku wahleka, wathi “heeeh! Ucabanga ukuthi ngizolala”. Then wangiphinda, she would open her mouth and say, “Spit in my mouth babe”, Ngithi haibo ngeke. Angilume ama Nipples, and ask, if I love it? Ngithi No! sis wam, angiphinde until I agree. Aphakame akhiphe amaKhandlela in her bag and some baby oil. I saw the door and ran away, I ended up sleeping in my brother's room.

In the morning when I got back ngamthola efake ikhanda under the bed again, I was like haibo ngamane ufele ngaphansi kwe Bhedi sfebe ndini, I'm not pulling you out. 🚮😭

[Aviwe Ndabazipheli @Aviwe_ii]

@Abramjee @eNCA @pule_jones now i believe one man can change the world bo fvcken 😂🔥

[Thandubuntu @Solphendukaa]

201 comments mostly looking for jobs . 💔😭

This is heartbreaking . Where we are as a country .

Something needs to change .

[Gloriaaa ❤️😍 @ladyhuneybee]

Give this man an interview already definitely following suit 😂😂😂🤌

[Nditsheni 😎 @Liltonny2]

@busiwe_bubu And the guy pouring beer in his nose???

[Mbali Mashinini @mbalis_bakery]

True 😭✋🏻

[Chymamusique @Chymamusique]

What’s that 1 common thing that accelerates MEN’s downfall ?

[Luna M @tiredfeminist_]

My problem is that I want the job without doing the interview😭 like, just trust me, I’m good!

[Gayton McKenzie @GaytonMcK]

Dear Media

I will not be giving any comment regarding the sentencing of Mr Malema except to pray for him and his family. Prison is tougher on families. I don’t celebrate when tragedy befall people even my enemies.

Thanks

[Nditsheni 😎 @Liltonny2]

@Honorabledawgs @Bokang_BigSis Do you pay for verification ?

[Fit With Dr Sam @FitWithDrSam]

Before marrying a woman,

I asked old and famous marriage counselor what I should actually look for in a woman.

I thought he’d say:

No tattoos
Doesn’t party
Doesn’t drink
Low body count
No guy friends

But instead, he said this: