Lou Misiano

stand up comic | night moves podcast

[Lou Misiano @LouMisiano]

I have this new game called “Does she make my heart race or have I done too many zyns?”

[Lou Misiano @LouMisiano]

@UnluckyLittleT1 @Soulful1865 You’re god damn mother fucking right brother.

[Lou Misiano @LouMisiano]

The wop community hasn’t been this up since the Sopranos. We are absolutely the fuck back 🤌🏼

[Lee (Greater) @shortmagsmle]

Like a true Italian, Luigi Mangione's fatal error as an assassin was giving himself away by stopping to flirt with the cashier at the cafe before going to work

[Lou Misiano @LouMisiano]

Man, I don’t know what it is about actors talking about acting that makes me want to rip my own dick off and throw it at the sun, but god damn does the shit stink.

[Lou Misiano @LouMisiano]

Nothing fires me up more than turning the page of a WWII book and there’s a map. Like fuck yes dude make me turn this page vertical as hell so I can see what’s up. Show me those arrows bruh. I yearn for the arrows. This is cocaine for me now.

[Lou Misiano @LouMisiano]

The #SAGAFTRA strike is finally over! Congratulations to all the waiters who got to take clout pics and pretend they were affected by it. Y’all finally got a chance to act.

[Lou Misiano @LouMisiano]

Super fitting that an actor from Friends died and people responded with the absolute un-funniest jokes I’ve ever seen.

[ppa @rustyjawn]

@Mikey_Scotto @dru_montana47 @Naim__Ali @timbutterly @mikerainey82 @RobCrewsComedy @shwangardini @ratboyjames Ayoo me a DM dawg! Me and @LouMisiano literally just wrapped up our 2nd show tonight for the Philly iteration of @RoastBattle

[Lou Misiano @LouMisiano]

Truly crazy that I stopped doing cocaine and I’m still broke.

[Lou Misiano @LouMisiano]

@_emilylime__ LETS GOOOOO

[Lou Misiano @LouMisiano]

The years finally stopped coming. https://t.co/95gTq1yC5p

[Adam Nutter @AdamNutter]

NEW @CultOfUscast w/ @LouMisiano

- Dating young chicks: Creepy or low key genius?
- LA is evil
- Drinking heavily in your 20's catches up to you
- & more!

[Lou Misiano @LouMisiano]

Sorry boys but I can’t make it! I got a date* tonight!

* 4 bud lights and a Lego Batman set

[Lou Misiano @LouMisiano]

@_emilylime__ It’s literally been stuck in my head for 20 years. That and the JG Wentworth jam have been on loop in my brain since 2003.

[Lou Misiano @LouMisiano]

@_emilylime__ THANKS FOR THE PACKAGE. THATS WHY IM WRITING.

[Lou Misiano @LouMisiano]

@SofiaPignitor Her: Why are you so bad at communicating your emotions?
Me: Zabwe dap dooby doo Zap a da dee dop zwe bop!

[Lou Misiano @LouMisiano]

@_emilylime__ WH WH WH WHATTTTT

[Lou Misiano @LouMisiano]

@mattwritesbooks @jbauwz does incredible work. Did jobs for Netflix and the lucas bros.

[Lou Misiano @LouMisiano]

Me: BABE. WHO WANTS TO HEAR SOMETHING THATS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY BUT ISN’T FUNNY AT ALL?!

Girlfriend: The people who come to your shows.

I need to lie down.