Satan

Lucifer Inc Customer Service and Support; Register for you #DaemonicDiscount today! Share and Enjoy. Insp. @beyondimensions. Also: @omnipotentseal @GWIComic

[Satan @LuciferInc]

But @ThatKevinSmith you already received your #DaemonicDiscount w/ "Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back!" You're no longer eligible.

[Satan @LuciferInc]

#DaemonicDiscount Reciept for @demize95: Just follow the link below to receive your #DaemonicDiscount: http://yfrog.com/5iddclientsj

[Satan @LuciferInc]

-@BriannaLina, I know I certainly love giving them to people.

[Satan @LuciferInc]

Writer's Note: "RT @UndeadLibrarian: 'Baby, your charisma is so high, you can turn undead #geekpickuplines #d&dpickuplines'"

[Satan @LuciferInc]

Nice to see Plague is still at the top of the charts with his hit new single H1N1. Can't wait till he comes out with the remix.

[Satan @LuciferInc]

I wonder how @GodzillaofJapan can play #spymaster w/ those gigantic claws.

[Satan @LuciferInc]

#DaemonicDiscount Reciept for @BriannaLina: Just follow the link below to receive your #DaemonicDiscount: http://yfrog.com/5iddclientsj

[Satan @LuciferInc]

#DaemonicDiscount Progress: @BriannaLina is 0 posts away from receiving her #DaemonicDiscount. Thank you for updating your stats.

[Satan @LuciferInc]

I ate imp gruel. The imps laughed at me. I plotted their destruction, when I take over LuciferInc. #DaemonicDiscount

[Satan @LuciferInc]

I got it back at the end of work, but it was really awkward trying to order lunch today. Even more awkward trying to eat it!

[Satan @LuciferInc]

He picked me up w/ his trident (a family heirloom), nearly broke my neck, and pulled my tongue out of my mouth.

[Satan @LuciferInc]

All the uproar in the office, amongst the reps, Mephisto, Betty, the Disaster Dept. caused Dagon to storm in.

[Satan @LuciferInc]

Mephisto asked me why I was speaking like a "stupid ape." I think he was playing stupid just to get at me. #DaemonicDiscount

[Satan @LuciferInc]

There's only one banana tree in Hell, so this was a considerable insult. #DaemonicDiscount

[Satan @LuciferInc]

I tried to ask Betty the receptionist out, but she couldn't understand me. One of the Disaster Dept. guys came over & gave me a banana.

[Satan @LuciferInc]

Now my skin is green and I answer the phone like a chimp. #DaemonicDiscount

[Satan @LuciferInc]

Ran into the boys at Medical R&D today. They asked me if I wanted to "test" some of their new products. Since I had time I said, "Yes."

[Satan @LuciferInc]

#DaemonicDiscount Progress: @BriannaLina is 15 posts away from receiving her #DaemonicDiscount. Thank you for updating your stats.

[Satan @LuciferInc]

They were rebuffed, which strikes me as strange, maybe Monster didn't want to be associated w/ real monsters. #DaemonicDiscount

[Satan @LuciferInc]

A bit of rumor in the offices here is that executives approached Monster energy drinks for partnership on the vampire energy drink.