Madelein Black

[Madelein Black @MADBLAAACK]

You’re looking at their following list, I’m looking at their Venmo

[Madelein Black @MADBLAAACK]

happy national girlfriend day to everyone who wishes i was their girlfriend!

[Madelein Black @MADBLAAACK]

I’m the password child, and don’t you forget it.

[Madelein Black @MADBLAAACK]

how come no one ever taught squirrels to look both ways before they cross the street?

[Madelein Black @MADBLAAACK]

the only good part about yoga is the nap time at the end

[Madelein Black @MADBLAAACK]

chances are i don’t think your baby is cute

[Madelein Black @MADBLAAACK]

my news years resolution for all the girls out there is to stop taking pics in groups like that

[Madelein Black @MADBLAAACK]

i’m at the point in life where anytime one of my friends posts a photo with their boyfriend my initial thought is that they got engaged

[Madelein Black @MADBLAAACK]

the stock market is just a glorified casino

[Madelein Black @MADBLAAACK]

i can’t explain it, but people take me more seriously in sweatpants

[Madelein Black @MADBLAAACK]

if people saw the way i spin around in my chair at work, they would think i’m the bosses daughter on take your child to work day or something

[Madelein Black @MADBLAAACK]

when people are megan fox for halloween im like, “oh so you think you’re hot?”

[Madelein Black @MADBLAAACK]

fries taste better when you you take them from someone else’s plate

[UtterlyInteresting @UtterlyInterest]

The angry little face as the green beans get snapped.

I've been laughing at this for an embarrassingly long time.

[Madelein Black @MADBLAAACK]

hey @Apple, please make a “mark as unread” option for imessage

[Madelein Black @MADBLAAACK]

i never got bullied in school, but i get bullied on the highway everyday

[Madelein Black @MADBLAAACK]

petition to ban single ply toilet paper

[Madelein Black @MADBLAAACK]

my biggest fear is that my cat jumps into the toilet and gets stuck

[Madelein Black @MADBLAAACK]

the best part about working from home is that i can cry and no one has to know

[Madelein Black @MADBLAAACK]

not me at the club checking my email