Moses Bagelstein

[Moses Bagelstein @MBagelstein]

Usc plays the most selfish style of basketball #morons #admissionscandal

[Moses Bagelstein @MBagelstein]

You know it’s a good Italian restaurant when your waiter recites the specials for 3 minutes and you don’t understand a single word

[Moses Bagelstein @MBagelstein]

Can’t wait for lax season bro 🤞

[Moses Bagelstein @MBagelstein]

😬

[Moses Bagelstein @MBagelstein]

It’s pretty ironic that all the front desk women at doctors offices are like 800 pounds

[Moses Bagelstein @MBagelstein]

The worst type of human is the guy who says “who shuffled?” when they have shitty cards #shutthefuckup

[Moses Bagelstein @MBagelstein]

Who else is seeing teddy Roosevelt on the moon tonight

[Moses Bagelstein @MBagelstein]

If you’re fat plz don’t fly on planes, just take the bus

[Moses Bagelstein @MBagelstein]

you don’t look bad in every picture, you just ugly

[Moses Bagelstein @MBagelstein]

Self checkout really comes in clutch when you’re buying embarrassing shit

[Moses Bagelstein @MBagelstein]

Why do fat guys always have shredded calves #numbersdontaddup

[Moses Bagelstein @MBagelstein]

Is it mandatory to have at least one crying baby on every flight #prochoice

[Moses Bagelstein @MBagelstein]

@srcollins04 It’s called shaking the bottle before like a normal person

[Moses Bagelstein @MBagelstein]

@mamadubutpits @OldTakesExposed

[Moses Bagelstein @MBagelstein]

Congrats Mitchell on the NVP. Well deserved, nobody worked harder

[PFF @PFF]

Patrick Mahomes could never

[Jeff D. Lowe @JeffDLowe]

Vote Mitch Trubisky for NVP on Nickelodeon. He’s leading. One more push.

#Mitch4NVP
#Mitch4NVP
#Mitch4NVP
#Mitch4NVP
#Mitch4NVP
#Mitch4NVP
#Mitch4NVP
#Mitch4NVP
#Mitch4NVP

VOTE: https://t.co/qar0hFu72l

[Moses Bagelstein @MBagelstein]

@mamadubutpits Thank you, it’s literally soggy croutons.

[Moses Bagelstein @MBagelstein]

@BarstoolBigCat The over:

[Moses Bagelstein @MBagelstein]

@BarstoolBigCat Matt nagys offense is finally coming together

[Moses Bagelstein @MBagelstein]

@mamadubutpits @ZachHarv Why does this actually look like you