Mike Wazowski

I'm funnier than an elephant wearing a top hat. Potential Comedian

[Mike Wazowski @MJW_HowUDancin]

can a slice a bread be any more appealing? nope... ok

[Mike Wazowski @MJW_HowUDancin]

I'm never on here anymore

[Mike Wazowski @MJW_HowUDancin]

A day of FaceTime with my new phone yay

[Mike Wazowski @MJW_HowUDancin]

What's happening? ... the human experience Twitter like duh

[Mike Wazowski @MJW_HowUDancin]

New invention idea: Tostitos poop n scoops

[Mike Wazowski @MJW_HowUDancin]

Crafting and painting and such on a rainy day like a boss

[Mike Wazowski @MJW_HowUDancin]

its #lefthandersday so be a supporter and tonight let your left hand drive your ship, give ur right hand a break

[Mike Wazowski @MJW_HowUDancin]

hi twitter, its me Michael ... i missed you, did you miss me, can we get back together and make this work? tune in next week

[Mike Wazowski @MJW_HowUDancin]

Bed,Bath and Beyond = get in my BED, after imma take a BATH and u best be BEYOND my threshold when im out

[Mike Wazowski @MJW_HowUDancin]

when the fruit flies come for me and my room i am liam neeson in taken "i have a particular set of skills FLIES!!"

[Mike Wazowski @MJW_HowUDancin]

#SaveBBCAN #WeWantBBCan6 #BringBackBBCAN

[Mike Wazowski @MJW_HowUDancin]

I havent said anything on this in forever. Why? CUZ I GOT NOTHING GOOD TO SAY it happens, im fine with it

[Mike Wazowski @MJW_HowUDancin]

nickelodeon how do i get you to start making a real life version of purple flurp for the masses

[Mike Wazowski @MJW_HowUDancin]

you dont have to tell me twice.... you have to tell me MORE than twice!!! i gotz zero memory skills

[Mike Wazowski @MJW_HowUDancin]

words of the night #tenyears #desperado

[Mike Wazowski @MJW_HowUDancin]

had the best time with @yeseniawalker trying artic bites downtown, trolling kensington market, window shopping, eating at frans diner etc!

[Mike Wazowski @MJW_HowUDancin]

Went to the Snakes and lattes with @yeseniawalker and amanda custodio! I won jenga hardcore!

[Mike Wazowski @MJW_HowUDancin]

I met @flatshanlon at the Lockhart tonight and she may be the world's nicest human being ever! What a gift she is !

[Mike Wazowski @MJW_HowUDancin]

Why am I an expert fisherman u say? cuz i've spent my whole life fishing for compliments... I'm good at it

[Mike Wazowski @MJW_HowUDancin]

Did I just become a delivery man? I believe i am owed a tip @ShannonsAZombie , this gurl doesn't tip!!!