your abusive father controlled his temper around coworkers, neighbors, friends, church members, cashiers, & strangers.
then he brought the rage home to people with less power to leave.
that was a choice he kept making.
There was a part on that video where the king threatened to stop giving MaMyeni money, it immediately reminded me why generations of women fought so hard for the right to work, own property, earn their own income, and participate fully in society. Economic independence was never just about having a career or proving you βdonβt need a man.β It was about dignity. It was about ensuring that no womanβs survival could ever be held hostage by a manβs wallet. Regardless of what happens between them, moments like these are a reminder of why financial independence will always matter.βΌοΈβΌοΈ
Incase anyone who can change my life sees this- hi my name is Simphiwe Mbatha. Welcomes to βMakeup Inspired by African Flagsβ PART 1. 39 flags that are love letters to each country. Part 2 coming soon β€οΈππΏπ¦ #colourmesim
βI cook for my husbandβ= Youβre a slave
βWe split the billsβ= Your husband is useless
βI spoil my wifeβ= Youβre a simp
βI dress modestlyβ= Youβre in an abusive marriage
βMy wife and I make decisions togetherβ= Youβre not a real man
βI canβt do random nights out because Iβm marriedβ = Youβre husband/wife is controlling
βMy wife earns more than meβ= Youβre a useless leech
βMy husband is the breadwinnerβ= You have no say since you bring nothing to the table
βI donβt need a male/female bestie because Iβm marriedβ= Your partner is insecure
This is how some of you see the world π
Yβall are far too pathetic and miserable to really understand what goes into making a marriage successful. Happy couples should keep it to themselves because you guys will find a fault in everything they do.
In 1998, I was fired from my corporate job while 9 months pregnant because and I quote, βmy priorities would be elsewhere after the baby is born.β
The lawyer I hired told me I didnβt have a case because discrimination like βthatβ was almost impossible to prove.
So I got pissed.
Took the LSAT. Went to law school. Passed the bar. Had 3 more kids.
Twelve years later, another woman from that same company was fired for the same reason. She sued them for a million dollars, and won, partly because I had kept every piece of evidence from what happened to me years prior demonstrating a systemic pattern of discrimination against women.
That company no longer exists. My law practice is thriving. And that baby they said would derail my priorities? Sheβs a brilliant attorney now working at my firm.
Turns out my priorities were indeed, elsewhere.
Not having children changes very little about your life. Having children on the other hand changes everything about it. Out of all the major decisions you can make, this is the one you cannot undo. You can leave a marriage, quit a job, move countries and always start over but