Maeve

amateur sleuth

[Maeve @MaeveyBea]

Today I am 24. Yesterday I was 23 and the day before that I was 16. Tomorrow I will be 32. This is how I feel.

[Maeve @MaeveyBea]

Scheduled my booster shot and my flu shot for the day after I move into my new apt - fever delirium in an unfamiliar space feels like a perfect opportunity for a spiritual reset

[Alexis @flexinlexi]

☯️

[Maeve @MaeveyBea]

Idk what my dream job is but I know it involves slamming a newspaper down on someone’s desk and yelling “EXPLAIN HOW YOU COULD LET THIS HAPPEN, JERRY!”

[Maeve @MaeveyBea]

@norawalls I WISH I was also ignorant of this fact

[Maeve @MaeveyBea]

Saw Man Ray: The Paris Years and now I’m feeling inspired to take more photos of all my hot and beautiful friends

[Adrian Bliss @adrianbliss]

Inside the Trojan Horse

[Maeve @MaeveyBea]

@Royal_FarmsReal Oh girl wut??

[Maeve @MaeveyBea]

As flies to wanton boys are the hottest women to men who say things like “your outfit looks dope”

[Maeve @MaeveyBea]

“In truth I know him to be a man capable of the most contemptible and boorish behavior; indeed a brigand of the worst order!” - me drunkenly warning the fellow girlies away from yet another straight white man wearing nail polish

[Maeve @MaeveyBea]

Putting out an RFP for a plus one to this year’s family vacation! Seeking qualified applicants to accompany only single daughter in family. References required. Bids considered through January 1, 2022.

[Maeve @MaeveyBea]

Sometimes being on Instagram is like woahhhhh forgot ur dad was a war criminal lol that’s on me girlie I sat next to in lecture in 2016

[Maeve @MaeveyBea]

I CAN rewrite my own narrative by reframing my shitty taste in men as a heroic effort to live symbolically!! And so can YOU!

[Maeve @MaeveyBea]

Cannot recommend watching You while a man works inside your home on a days-long project. It’s nothing personal sir I just believe you are a psychotic murderer

[Maeve @MaeveyBea]

God really didn’t pour a drop of Apollonian into the nutribullet with me She was like “100% Dionysian baby this one will only live for fun and pleasurable sensory experiences!!”

[Maeve @MaeveyBea]

Just got an email from someone asking for some career mentorship. Iconic blind leading the blind moment!! I’m all in baby let’s scramble in the dark together

[Maeve @MaeveyBea]

I went on four dates with a guy who watched Will Ferrell’s film Eurovision every night before bed 🤪 what have you done to spread the good word lately, sisters?

[Maeve @MaeveyBea]

Stared Death in the face in the Cane’s drive through

[Maeve @MaeveyBea]

“What If Chromatica Had Been Released While I Was In College? An Exploration of Multiverse Theory” - title of my speculative fiction/alternative reality memoir

[Maeve @MaeveyBea]

Crisp chill in the air and thought of this tweet with a smug grin as I reintroduced the winter moisturizers to the nighttime routine. Moisturize or Dieturize

[Maeve @MaeveyBea]

@rexxwalkerr Nothing like puking on a plane baby