if you want a specific standard then only accept that. chasing someone who is below your standards while expecting the person to change in order to fit them isnt fair.
if you wanted a tesla, you would get a tesla. you wouldnt get a honda and expect it to be a tesla.
i used to hold everyone to my standards and that wasn’t fair. i had to learn how to have my standards while also accepting people for who they are. getting to know and accept, hold space for people to just be themselves rather than expecting them to rise to fit my standards. no
if anyone actually wants to build a friendship with me we need to discuss love languages, boundaries, expectations, set standards. im not the kind of person that bonds deeply through occasional check ins and kikis. sorry.