Matt Austin

Inventure enthusiast, coach, millennial, economist, & crazy person. #Skol

[Matt Austin @MattByronAustin]

Coffee was invented by someone with 2 kids.

[Barack Obama ____________________________🇺🇸Fan @ThePresObama]

I want to thank @StephenCurry30 & Lebron James for coming by the Whitehouse when we had a democracy.

[Matt Austin @MattByronAustin]

Good luck to the OG Squad today vs @DaytonLax. See you next year G Unit!

[Matt Austin @MattByronAustin]

@MatthewBerryTMR REAL: dude in our league lives in Puerto Rick & I can't get ahold of him. As commissioner, how should I handle his matchup?

[Matt Austin @MattByronAustin]

Some days this is the only way to end on a good note.

[Matt Austin @MattByronAustin]

@scottontvKSDK how can we find this comet 45P tonight? Thanks Scott!

[Matt Austin @MattByronAustin]

@DaveMurrayFOX2 How can I find comet 45P tonight? Thanks Dave!

[Matt Austin @MattByronAustin]

Deshaun Watson featured in a commercial on ESPN performing a celebration that would get him fined $10k on Sundays. Josh Norman is upset.

[Matt Austin @MattByronAustin]

My son just audibly farted and then blamed it on the dog. He's 1.25 years old. I've never been more proud of him.

[Matt Austin @MattByronAustin]

You know you're in for a long day when your visit to the doctor elicits the response "Yeah, wow, that's pretty messed up"

[Matt Austin @MattByronAustin]

Standard Jeff Fischer protocol...run a fake, fake punt...after your second consecutive 3rd & out.

[Men's Humor @MensHumor]

This sound guy took a beating!

https://t.co/FBzy59CoH4

[Matt Austin @MattByronAustin]

WTF

[Matt Austin @MattByronAustin]

#GaryJohnson

[Matt Austin @MattByronAustin]

Andrew Luck needs to be traded to Arizona immediately. He could play for his favorite coach & I could watch him on the Fox broadcast. #Win

[NFL on ESPN @ESPNNFL]

Odell Beckham has 23 Rec yards tonight. His career-low is 28 in 2014 Week 6.

[Matt Austin @MattByronAustin]

@NotoriousDMD @andyclayback @amazon @AmazonHelp feed me zaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

[Matt Austin @MattByronAustin]

Discovery of the day: you can use a banana as an iPhone stylus. You're welcome.

[Matt Austin @MattByronAustin]

A white flag only costs $20. Coulda saved some money. https://t.co/w9ax9tGoob

[Adam Schefter @AdamSchefter]

Vikings traded 2017 first-round draft choice and a fourth-round pick to Eagles to acquire QB Sam Bradford, per @Edwerderespn.

[Matt Austin @MattByronAustin]

@AmerenCorp do you guys buy fridges and freezers?