Matt Murphy

i just rip tweets

[Danny Polishchuk @Dannyjokes]

Occasionally I think about the second episode of Tucker Carlson’s podcast where he interviewed some random guy who said he did meth and sucked off Barack Obama

[Matt Murphy @MatthewR_Murphy]

sorry can’t hang out i’m having an ego death rn

[Noah @NoahKingJr]

small accounts be like:

[Matt Murphy @MatthewR_Murphy]

do junkies ever bar-crawl trap houses or do they just post up at one location and hang out

[Matt Murphy @MatthewR_Murphy]

it’s lowkey cold outside

[Matt Murphy @MatthewR_Murphy]

used to be such a fire line to say you were gonna ask Jeeves something instead of googling

[Matt Murphy @MatthewR_Murphy]

what i tell myself in the mirror

[Noah @NoahKingJr]

mfs who keep tweeting with 0 likes fear no one 😭

[Matt Murphy @MatthewR_Murphy]

thought i bought an aura ring but ts is watching me sleep

[temple runner @misscalcula]

aura farm by george orwell

[Kendall Pennington @Kenny___Rose]

consultants be like have u tried lowering costs and increasing revenue

[Matt Murphy @MatthewR_Murphy]

this is every doctor I’ve ever been to

[miss worm @missus_wormy]

You can ignore health problems until they go away

[Matt Murphy @MatthewR_Murphy]

they want you to make shirts and wear party hats

[Matt Murphy @MatthewR_Murphy]

when a coworker hides their birthday - they really want you to shower them with attention by throwing a surprise party and giving sentimental gifts

[Matt Murphy @MatthewR_Murphy]

they are silently begging you to get everyone together in a circle around them and sing happy birthday

[Matt Murphy @MatthewR_Murphy]

how do i vibe code more swag

[Matt Murphy @MatthewR_Murphy]

@s4m31p4n i lowkey don’t fw loki

[Matt Murphy @MatthewR_Murphy]

lmao

[Matt Murphy @MatthewR_Murphy]

This shit’s going to blow past $200 an ounce

i want the receipt for when it happens

[Matt Murphy @MatthewR_Murphy]

Mr. Krabs:

[lil piss baby @11kmrn]

i should have unlimited money

[Matt Murphy @MatthewR_Murphy]

@NotJosephGarcia this is called crisis method acting

[Matt Murphy @MatthewR_Murphy]

your honor i just be saying shit